A letter from September 4th, 2016

Peaceful right?

To my sweet child I dont know if u will ever read this but i hope that someday u will Am still waiting for u Am still waiting for the day that i meet u and hold u in my arms Feel u .. Smell u and just be there for u I cant wait to met u To be ur mother Am 25 years old now and i have to be honest with u Am losing hope That one day .. U will be mine My hope I have been afraid To think about u To dream about u Because it hurts me To imagin u Dream about it And just see u .. In my dreams and imagination I want u in reall I need u And i love u .. Even before i knew that u are mine I love u Even before i knew that i can have u And u r my hope U r the resone why i keep on living Hoping that one day I will feel u growing inside me Hoping that one day i will bring u to this life and call u my chile Ohh u dont know how much i dreamt about u How many time i layed my hand on my tummy and imagined u inside playing And moving as i talk to u I would spend hours just day dreaming about u And i would watch mothers with their childeren and say to myself When ..!! When its gonna be me ! They say a mother's love is so strong and unlimited Well Mine must me much more then that Am still single And u seem so far away from me But i still carry this love for u A love which started years before i had u I hope .. Wish .. Pray from the bottom of my heart and soul That there will be u in my life and u would read this Love Your mother

Epilogue

about 1 year later

Am 33 years old now!
8 years after writing that letter.

so many thing has changed, I have changed.
to be honest i was selfish when i...

,ltetre i ahstgirt roetw ahtt w'stna ihgntikn.
.
Ees 2 mrof aryse wkne ftare i a tosl, lament that fufgsnier i 62 wtha uyo ylon dna enwh selslin nwogr wsa saw saw i i swa.
.
I ro swa tath aws abyem mkngia i gouhtth my iarobpl, me act ttah innoetrnmve yaslaw klei.
.
I mpdd tath hda thtur saw eth.
Dhicl ma taht i diatm adn a ggsrtunilg o,uwntb !?!!! am of mioeotns asrey ym onlctro itsll 8 rmeo rtlae nvihag i , in.
.
Not hatt uoy yuo know evlo ym to blae ahve i em to si how ahtt ho mchu am eestw naetm iwll fro , esdnii , dtno uyo ruse eolv i eb i icdlh vige.
.
Twsee ym unrnbo ihdlc de,aeu-ntrc.
Is adn ma adn 0%11 rovidep not a pae,cl seluns tnac i tepocrt i eth ahtt wldro hree ouy nca ruse nrbgi saef. .
.
Uoy aer i htta veondeicc ocen iwll nokw veig renev rteiyhvgne i i tath you hda. .
Elfi wkor adn dan dene feysml on i my to oredr taht od in to.
.
Go atr,hfe snrpoe wlil i velo ingazam to so but he you , dufon na and baby eh het rouy ned vsreinue mhuc nad , eht you fo ofr si.
.
Ot won ttha ew gwrknio eb no bonr sulvroese hobt rithg on lefi goniwrk , eveerds ni eangirtc yuo rea het dan.
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Ewtes tillet my ildhc.
Rou nanyl.