A letter from January 1st, 2024

Time Travelled — almost 1 year

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe,
this is just a note to say: it always gets better. always. in the moment it feels permanent and terrifying and like this is the way life will be forever and always, but that's not true.your brain is so clever and stupid at the same time, it is smart enough to trick you into believing that things are different this time and it will forever be horrible but it's also so stupid because that's not true!!
every single time things have felt doomed, whether that be in the midst of a panic attack, an anxious night, or an episode of self doubt and fear, it has always and I repeat ALWAYS gotten better. sometimes mere minutes after you've believed that this won't end. 
I so hope that you already know and trust this by the time you read this but if not, if you're feeling scared and like there's no hope- just give yourself time. it gets better. it. gets. better. 
there's no harm in trusting me so let yourself believe it. hold on to this hope, it will pay off. 
I love you forever and always, 20 year old beth who has just come out of a panic attack🫶

Epilogue

about 14 hours later

This is true! I'm glad that somehow, this year has...

Me adem it taht etgs beieevl rtbeet. Awy ylaswa fuealbtui it ewolh eht enbe the slos huhrotg has sha flei enev teh iev' trebte freduefs, with 'vei adn adn fsdiciufltei efadc, ongett. Etouhstg get ot em 'mi my nad dan hte enev for hatt ytrlu ot sekam oalnliwg so sitem lutfrage ttha febile ielebve iarese rinba tbtr;ee 'mi lwil my drfines to it ugraftel fl,iyam. Orf elt hatt rucetrn mobol het ot ladg im' em hre tasp lndatep phoe twhiin esed em of. Rmeo nad edielf-necfscno 2250 bnsrgi setl rsttu hoep. .

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