A letter from Feb 22nd, 2022

Dear FutureMe, You love him. Don't you? Love is a great feeling. You deeply care abt him. Pray for him. Want him to do well in all aspects of life. He also cares for you. Listens you out. Mend his ways. Try to do better and become a better version of himself. He also notes down details and observes small stuffs, doesn't he? But is he perfect embodiment of what you wanted your partner to be? No. Let's take this question far- fetched. Do you believe in perfection? No. Can you be perfect, 'his version of perfect'? No. Then how can I expect him to be what i think is perfect and like it that way. If i love him enough, shouldn't i accept him the way he is and trust him. I should. I know. What is holding me back. Ik. It is that-- 1. He will hurt me and walk over me like anything. So i keep looking for every small small things that he is doing, saying or meaning or behaving. He must feel like being in a live reality show all the time. Imagine someone doing this to you. I would have been frustrated like hell and ran away. what abt then him hurting me? Well that if a person has to, he will. Also, this way if he let him be himself more so then i won't be having regrets. 2. i judge him on all basis and correct him even if he deviates thoda sa off the mark of perfection and in the end, it is all leading him to suffocate and mounding pressures. I feel he has to be this perfect guy that i imagine alongside my future self and if he is not like that , then it's my responsibility to make him into one. And ik this is just so so wrong at so many levels. So what do i have to do? Listen to him with all interest and heart. Don't interrupt. Don't interfere. Don't judge. Let him be. Give advice only if he seeks. If you have smth to say or add or u don't like, think abt it later and talk then. In case of his delay in replying or declined call. Ask urself is there even one percent chance that he wasn't able to make it? If yes, make urself busy. If not, excused and move on. Don't ask so many questions on whereabouts. He can lie if he wants to hide or doing anything wrong? Let him be. True nature can't be his for long. Believe. That's all. Irrespective of what has happened in past, if it strikes, remind urself that you have committed some severe mistakes too. IIT ONE. PHOTO FAKE being majors. So if you have changed since then, he has too. Love him. Treat him nicely. And rest, leave it upto god. Give him his space and take ur own. He is not responsible for your mental well being or happiness or entertainment or anything. Be independent in all these aspects. Don't be a dependent. At the end, my heart knows he is a good person. I have seen him in happiness, in anger, in frustration and i have always loved him. Baaki, let him be. Believe in urself, ur deeds and actions and leave rest to the almighty. //Cherish him. //