A letter from Feb 14th, 2022

Dear FutureMe, It's V day, the thought of never having ever received a gift on this day still makes you feel like an unattractive person who isn't worthy of love, and that's the reason no one wants to date you! Believe me, that is NOT the case. You are seeking love and you wish to find it, but the feeling you're having is valid, yet not true. so please, just don't take the path of the victim, you are an interesting individual that just has not met her match, maybe you won't, but here is a very serious question! How is your relationship with yourself? Are you still working out every day! Are you still stuck in the same day job? Are you having anger episodes each time your period comes? Did you learn to cook more frequently? Did you find someone worth sharing your life with? Did you stop M? I know for the past 2 months you have done it 10 times instead of literally every single day and I am proud of you! yet I hope you realize that it is the days where you can't help but do it are the days where you scratch right back to zero and back to day one with such a thing! I hope once i get this letter you have completely quit it! Did you change work positions? Or are you still someone else's slave, slaving away for a very cheap paycheck that is only helping you get the bare minimum?? did you go back to Uni? for that extra cirruculum you always wanted? Today and the day before you have been using the quitters attitude in every incounter you have with a task that would bring your life into a better situation! I do not approve of this behavior currently and I am praying to god that I will not have to deal with this pethatic version of myself a little under a year from now! When you read this you will probably be feeling like I am being hard on myself but truth be said there is no such thing! I need a slap on the face each time I am about to settle for les than a fabulous life! You're now leaving the computer to go clean the dishes, do Wodoo and then pray all prayers for the day! because you are a good person who does not want to live the rest of her immortal life in hell! which is still up to this moment as a high probability event! I would be more than grateful to know you have not given up on yourself and you are pushing yourself into becoming someone you are proud of. I know for sure you are proud of who you are now but still struggle with the idea that you were worst and you want to slip back but realize there was nothing but fear, pain and shame in your past (you were acting like a victim and still are in some areas) All that to say is please make me Prouder!! Okay, Here is what I can Visualize for you to be doing: - A Distinguished English Teacher who already has students under her wing - A person who has travelled Abroad once again - A side job as a designer on Fiver or Freehali! As long as i side hustle!! - Have a love Interest on the road to Marriage! - Becoming a good swimmer - Finish the Quran at least 6 times! - Have health insurance card - took off all wisdom teeth - Run 10k