A letter from Dec 26th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, Hey! Long time no see, obviously its been a moment. How is life going? How are your grades? Hope you got the grades you really wanted to get, well us. Right around this time next year we would have set out our University applications, and would have already done so much. I am so proud of you. I know you could so much. I love you. Did we apply to all the universities that we wanted to apply to, it might have been really risky being all BMAT but...? Hope we did that application to Cambridge? If you did, around this time you would have to be doing your Cambridge interviews, if so this email will be some motivation, if so, You've obviously worked so hard, nobody deserves it more than you. I know how hard you've worked (yeah duh I'm you). You are just as capable as everyone else that is going to be there. Please just do you A-Level revision and you will be fine. You have done the hardest part. I can promise you that. Well until you reach medical school but you already know that. It might only be a year from now but you know how it can be, a moment can change the whole course of one's life. How are your friends? Still friends with all the people you made friends with? Even better made more friends? Do you still sing your heart out everyday, even if it bother everyone around you just because you like it? Do you still play the Piano? How's it going with learning the guitar? I hope its going better than what going with right now- How's the dog? How's Dad and our Sister doing? Do we get the diagnosis that we've been waiting for? (probably not but its a good wish to have). How's it been in the relationship department? Hope it's been doing well because you'll remember it's a little lonely out here... Do you have that person who you can unconditionally go to when you want to go talk to? Someone that I really need right now. I really do hope everything is going much better than what is going now. Most importantly, how have you been mentally? Really? There is something that I really need to tell you, something really important, no matter how you feel, no matter how broken you are at the moment. I will always love you. I don't know if you still need to know this, but I probably would have loved to hear this from past me. There is nothing that could stop me from loving you. No matter what, little you will love you with all she has. P.S. Faith says Hi Written, To, 16 Year old you. 17 Year old you.

Epilogue

42 minutes later

Hi past me,

Oh how much I would love to scoop you up and give you the biggest hug ever. I'm so happy you decided to live. Best. Decision. Ever....

Ouy and oury got to of r'eatn hsti firts ,tyapr sotl etglwii,hhgt nwte aereldis olts rleewjy you aery a. Olve ttah rlneead stiggbe to sureyfol eth fo all, was githn oyu. Tesmtra lyelar dan atth httas' lal. Nda ishtsetgl i thhgou egvi gusy anc srdeia adrsdnast ,yas yuo the bti eahv tisll of yuo ruoy acseh rolegn hwo nt,ionteat slegni, on. . . Hoguht lnoy erneyclt. Oemseaw, nad gngio go! glon i deagrs are ew mcedorpa ot lltsi rou a*,ab rae veha idngo wya a d,ee wlel our kinht we awmeose ot.
Dtie og laideser usjt a)gihntny adn cbka (i nact' i. .
Aedm so namy insaen vhae yuo i'ts f,dnires. Unhma uoy a liek dna latk to gsyu cna gbein egurlar. .
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Edutor embceo a og than eeddidc svismae a ni ialdemc tino to uj,en coodrt eamd we rahseerc nda. Naarlut lieppad alilbcasy edddice ininthkg od rewe two ot ot nda nscescie, oubat ouy. Inu eswmaoe tihw dna adn ecmobe now you a sffore tshoi,ibcysip ot nwat esrdga otw. I ew kntih anc do ti. Gigno ro lunrtcrye buoat ot uoy ear ulc ninkthgi murdha. Ddnesep fi gives luc ouy efrfo the. Ogt ecidedd othghu tif they teh ewre dmeees uoy tub bfoere at ysld,a from githr etercjde mi,et inewvr,eti ew a itgrh it armcgeibd. Aerdngi raey, vaeh me eatetrhds alts doluw thsi gaiimning. Aveh tub worng os rvehnygeti nda so llwe ew is u,mhc gogin. .
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Hegnca m,nmeot nac ot ti nca nyangtih ti cesmo a nwhe in hte,. Otko in to you eard a kobo oitindecr tnio hrwot elfi ot lowhe swa tedrfiefn for all ti uyo neo. Utre ot vryee ytsdea uyro raeht ahwt tis oloflw ,ssay ediddce adn ouy.
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Pyal gogin evha ogminr!,!pi)v teh i to uto eth trega i are is ym and htear ew sing apin,o tsill rgaitu i sya na(d. A efw od uoy sti yoka rhsdoc tub tcn'a. . . Ubt iggno omst od you ewll ist fo tnac' tmhe atreg. Yanirnge eht a niag,a lolec niloiv edpkic ofr pu adn laeyrl lsao ovu'ye. Miet het gknalit you ucsim osybultlea obaut lla kics sdad ellt acn you fo i. .
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Teh deb, aowseem is aer stiser adn god dda my idong rurceltyn of ta tfoo plegiens teh. Swa ewnt so baorda oyu on zcayr nyma rpits it. You uoy dpxeerlo ndeedcnpiene. Got anttiso a of evne wsa eref hte a aproe eht by uyo neci lodnno and to in erdi iiwk othampn occha. 'tbsut anpi cmhu ni gto slitl i oru eth lceso,r uro erstis nda. Eomdv yruo acme uter ellasrm uyo hte r,oom whis oitn. Tarpec anoryme ist the oflros anret' !zracy.
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Fo rtcoso'd we nawdet we tgo ihtw hte mots ftusf ogaedinsd eht whti. Rnuedt uyo atger dan iytveegnrh tog yaret,hp out. Ebcuno owkr we becsuae ,yare ckb,a amde ahd btu yalwas we shphdsair ti yuo isth mayn. Iengsaimr uryo peytrt sad,erceed elpes eavh oruy gigno uhmc si fine. Rae dosigdane tiniawg to ihtw eidorpsnes anettetmr sillt gto btu get tath you. Tmei the pierosedns iiemondcta yuo swa on wree eht orews uaigcsn teh kngmia ta. N!ospre yuo tihw had a dnmtoceaii leki the hucm ,wrog ot wne wen utb so are lstil.
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Onw by sti liegns, we bmyea istll hugoht hocice. Peke soustir teh ggoni eenb mtrsa eerth rof uoy tub veha sslohae. A vleo guy hte you ubs ihtw lfla no ni idd. . To pskeo mih vnere evne ugohth ouy. Swa ve'ntah he oppped a uoy yc!raz ti botua nryjuaa tlo ihm uhoght amy, slilt yuo and mih esen ,pu ihntk sneci. Sti tbi a the hnikt ywnorirg i twha stwan tbu tearh. Lwli dan how daseuc seltni vaeh fo hsti omoseen htta nda aevh fmeishci 'dtno lal you lrubseot eth tub heva uoy ve,en ot tath lltsi ialcspe ew all erya rouy lla. Smot the eht ni you tmso fo ot 2220 lal of lilw talk yuo alkt oyur areledsi sfdiner uyo ot ll,a lypone, btu oenprs. Lysorfue.
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Nebe eavh ln,yemlat uor gtingte eayrd rof a,egtr cokms dgoin i emwaoe!s. Na nwo s,lewfsanh sa saol a yuo aosl do vlele sicshyp. Athde, tanw uoy celviyta hgtri, rpuuse to is eutbjcs elfi tasth btecsju eys uyo eht ni wno eht. Is ynfnu ahtt? how.
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Ps. I ot me htat iafth adsi dotl a goa oasl ayre esh ih. Oll.

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