A letter from Nov 5th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, This year has been rough. COVID has been bad, although it's kind of dying down. I have already been double vaxxed. I hate wearing masks wherever I go. You're in Grade 10 now, aren't you? Wow, how it must feel to be 15. You're one year away from your learning permit for driving! I hope emotionally and physically you're doing better. I'm still going through some depression and anxiety, although not severe depression, but a lot of anxiety the past few months. Have you shifted yet? I just know I'm getting really close. I've been writing down almost everything that comes to mind in my script. I hope I'll shift soon. If you have shifted, what method do you use? I know it's kind of pointless to ask because you're in the future and we can't write back and forth like normal people. How's Allyssah Smales? Aiko (Michelle, although she likes to be called Aiko or Bunnie)? Are you even still talking to them? Are you dating anyone? Have you had your first kiss? I hope you have. Have your art skills gotten any better? I want to sculpt and do watercolor paintings and draw cool stuff, but I can't really bring myself to do anything. Have you made any new friends? Have you achieved your Light Academia style aesthetic dream? Do you have a cat? Another dog? How's Miles? Is he okay? I hope he is. Are you still obsessed with Bakugou and My Hero Academia? I hope that phase never ends. :) Am I annoying? I hope I'm not. My self-esteem is pretty low. I hope that gets better in the future. I love you. Keep going, you're worth it. :)

Epilogue

10 days later

hi me!

im doing much better now. ive been in the hospital twice this year for mental health reasons, and you wouldnt be surprised to hear that its not great....

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Ety vthena i hdfetis. Leylar aryoemn tyr i dnto. Rghohtu utoghh lveo i rfo sphae that howle oyu gogni. Rsepu nda are iblseef oruy oghnetism sreu nuqieu yeour. Teh ujts eiv efylsm i klie i in utb gginnimai sceisaonr iitotmnvoa suesg teohr solt. Igogn tt!ah yuo i lsitl u,gothh ekpe nwko.
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Eilnxtf dton ltka ao(ml) but eoayr,nm and eus lshlyaa i erh tsill i ntuoacc. Taedlk dan yeras ioka eatnvh i rfo. Ehs etrow lrotyhs atrfe isth em ot apepaedsidr lttree uyo. I but htnsomeig twah tdno tknih kwno dae,enphp it i lelray dba aws. Oh lwel. Ehop own sesh tretbe dgnoi i. Obht fo ehmt. .
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Ngiadt a colepu yeon,an mi ekews i goa ont ubt asw. On aws he was ikand up we it hntik lyug edr beeacsu fgal ahtt akbc a adn i now kbero ganit cuaalytl oto he. Tisdup hhttogu rewe eh ocsdmno. Teh hwo i elalyr pleca i frtsi oudlvec lkdie dotn see in mhi. .
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Nto cnrtee in sitfr 2022 os it aevh !isks itdielynfe toh,guh hda i my. I xsaule cnout nceods adh bceuase odtn swa the asstula ssik ti i. Mites ehsot taths to tewn thpisloa eht i yhw. Gouhht ndheipsu tnteigg saeraslut is nad the im cuhm btteer nwo. .
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Yaok i my art ear ikllss ssegu. Ryllae nito heav shigtn dna bnee zdtelisy gdiwrna enw tog a eockbkthso i ewek tlas. A hwti otu adn lrcosuo i fo rwed nrtued ergta ostl ooamtt ti layler dizesylt. A ecilnsp dlureooc tahw uyo slpa on uoy teg atths nhubc newh 'euory idong tihw on a adnomr fo waht egssu agep iaed i. .
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Amyn rfdisne edma so 'eiv wne. Rpesdiusr! fro omes fo eher you ltsi eb thme oudy lil. .
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Adn ,msa m,lai ,owrar r,uth e,roilv giirf,fn leratcs,t alehis,t xi,aels ,tonnna ,leo sh,a athtmew. Fo !mthe all enci evne athts all pures and rteeyh ont. Losetcs now, in ams eenv het is ivgmno trmsesee, ta fbareruy ouhhgt my edn itrhg efindr het of esh. Be oot caaonitv mghit we eitosesmm we givonm reewh sono oni,nmilaut to utg,ohh. A ruoedt ahs no cripe anisdl the onudf ndwo nbee we eogn rou() ncei teh and ryllae my ttah hseuo ecisn ev'we tresapn enev. .
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Stuj yestl ugnrnbi ttha ipoextinafhry swa uoabt dna a onw i teysl nipssao a ghn,it teh thwi etcthasei haet ahtt. Orb rosyr. Rhe mena lltcayua etg idd amy ohtrean ew !dog si. Raismepnd wno dan typetr tsi aetfr bhot oolc veah arcershcat! aym mles,i ew so. Ot tstah yoak teggtni atwh imesl as wosn sdgo vetaic she eesaubc dloer sdue nad do he btu as stin htsat oevls eb teh nad yam. .
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Ncuikgf with atht ma i on way esdsesob hsit tslil. Oevld i ot my at tbu edsu tiem tionp ti het a in owl i elyral ogkionl efil atht kbca eb am,en wsa hwo i ta. K,di aols ttah be erdwi ttah eusrp maine used aws i etcpytresoial htea eht uyo ot. Etebrt hgih is at lshcoo sltea. Mcaagi eht atsl ekil nad rthgi won beeianrrd tavraa i dkamoa. .
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Sporen tno todn a and we nyin,onga ryeou hrotuhg go hgannity ryuoe cayullta sdevere lyealr keli doog htat ot. No noe leiv flei on eels dan ellh is and ahtw the si and oyu ruoy so dbsae wno cnoe ouy nfu aekm yoln od trhso aueescb inrxcepeee uyo twan tahw natw yuo ewar ihntk tawn odnicssei etwerahv dan wath uyo. Go anawn uohgth i jgpnumi elyrla egeunb. Oocl. .
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Nbee hsa unf cohslo al,os hghi. Vie ni of ylealr onw seary and vimorp poleep a two club fro etm the tol eneb oclo. Adn kgatin era veah meserest shit lecrrtnuy aseslcs mi oo,igkcn koya a my 95 igogn in i cwihh. Afr! speru hestihg of so lmsfey ardge im rodup my. .
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Amh rouy nuf nda yb!e ejlol- vhae nrezfo nwsa,yya hitw gpsear. .
(p. S. Ctustiai rueoy. Tge saogdined yuo snoo. Diea are :3) ocpeul seayr angihv hwo nfu veha exnt rfo on yuo hte.

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abigailbliv:

over 2 years ago

The shifting part hit home

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