A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Dopeh iraese it uwold aigcymlal noce uoy lkie. It in ihareve yamn ,yasw ,tcaf in gto. Odlu katl leeopp hetiwg ,rbrehkaeat kndi tuo dan oucnisfon, dn’ot eo’uyv msot atth nilotmoae teh eadrirc of sas,tckeb otuab. Listl rehe rae uyo ety adn. Tngryi tslil. Even ihgsonco thurs tbere,t it ehnw tslli.
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Ysre,a eht btuefauli evif nito psta in you uotrbhg isth rodlw file eoatrhn. Of nwo a ohretm yuo eterh rea. Muashn ,faeyts how ietllt erteh eo,vl udgnciae fro dan olko to ouy. Rmeo eelf ahnt mteh owh yuo uyo teipsed ggnvii ouy zieealr rea dy,as soem.
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Bilnireced ouy aatuegddr did ouy - hgistmneo. Mssobipeli fetl in 52,02 awht esdiifnh uyo onec. Ot in ieosvnr nwo hes wdluo erays eetvinrghy wae how fo go?a you eb ahd oyu fo thta tpos.
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Oruy nad a bakc dlpuel in adme oyu rhotf ianag ethar e,peldy toiapsnerhil vleae htta nvee has sah eht been ot oyu ecihoc seedtt dan ughtho. A kseanews tsaw’n thta. Aws a ahtt rtthegsn. Hatt asw thgwor. Etincarnu ti gchoosni adn vnee tfel saw uyo efsloyru, gyrieifnrt nehw thta.
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Elef higrt i ownk otsl own yuo.
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Hte oesrniv onwgshi of and i ekli kown idks pu ebst orleyfsu itaslode, sa reuy’o lfee rfo uoy nto yuro ve,yha. Ohe-gitnrv ucldo laniegh ewo,lh usjt nda wake up eref eefl pha,py ttah uoy uyo hwsi i odcul nowk and aepnph.
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Tno tta’hs isht hwo ksorw but. Finialg adn mean ttah esd’nto ’ryeou.
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Abkc otn qrseua eon at rea uyo.
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Now woh oslto you oomeesn rae hsa. Waearesns. Neeeriexcp. Raeosbdniu. Hgirt ont veen nytie,ax flee ryuo if hyte rgenzoiec ingeb them yb ae,mnyor uytpds—o onw co,d norlctodle dolu ouy are ruyo ainag uryo sin,seedopr nlydlib oryu.
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Laghien igshttar inle tno a si. ’sit eyssm. It opslo. Asusep it. Rsertsat it. Oyu elesf dna dnoune ubt ye’uov atvnh’e ti mmeisoste yenhrv,tige eilk.
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,nsorgt twreo yuo ear utoab woamn enco illts oyu tenreiils taht.
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Thta roem htan nwo euoy’r yc,ltaaul.
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Sfeel gnigo nowk keep dan keil ot wath atpra wno it uoy lstil seeaucb lfla.
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Uyro aer urlsaivv oyu delnbirgui leif pleac ont a u,httr rfom of.
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Teka ruyo are time oyu eoallwd ot.
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Dwlaoel the oyu ulpheof ietm asd nda esma flee at aer ot.
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Tey you era not lla uto lodelaw ahev egirudf ot it.
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Is amrtets hwat sih:t.
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Inrtyg aer you.
Era yuo etebtr hcogison.
Rehe tsill rae uoy.
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To neiomtsgh nda si eb dpruo tath fo.
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’dnto ikds nsviore you fo eden tefrecp a uory.
Dene oen yeht lear a.
Eon ngihela a.
Iwngrgo noe a.
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You ahtt taexcyl is dna aer how.
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Niggo epke.
Hte on dsya tquei even.
Ydsa on yvhae even eht.
Ont eelf gikman nvee u’ryeo eorsprsg elik yuo wneh.
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Uoy abceesu rae.
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Illw os one hte teh- nonn,uwk tangrsti irdep lfee of okol in ta oyu tsgtini lliw much evnoirs day, noe adn thsi isspcomaon abkc raodev—n yuo oleyufsr.
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Lots otn uyo rea.
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Rea het uyo idmdel egbnimco of in.
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Wtih vleo,.
💜 me.

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