A letter from Sep 10th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, It's me, You. But 1 year prior. I'm writing this to see how far we've progressed. You remember the time we became severely depressed. Those 4 months, where we struggled to get up during late afternoons, just waking up after overthinking for countless hours until late. The nights we spent venting, through clouds of vapour at the sound, no, the sounds, so melancholic, it left you numb. We started schema-based therapy in June. We took a step forward to save ourselves because we knew that no one was going to be there to help us. When we were bullied for years. When we failed to meet expectations. When we were mistreated despite being kind. There was never anyone there we could share our feelings with. Times changed though. We became this emotionless block of human flesh, hateful, spiteful, but never vengeful. Hateful of ourselves, our surroundings and every aspect of our lives. We're not doing that anymore. It's time to start loving ourselves. I hope you're doing the same. I'm struggling. I do struggle, I do get demotivated, I do procrastinate, I do develop bad habits, but at the same time, I DO want to get better. So in one year, I hope things have gotten better. I hope I'm driving (finally). I hope we can travel wherever. I hope you went on the night city bike ride. I hope you have more self-discipline. I hope you're more fit. I hope you look hella drippy. I hope you have a better fashion sense. I hope you helped your youngest brother's transition into high school. I hope you've started to love yourself. I hope you've developed a bit of a passive income. I hope you've become more emotional. I hope you've developed more social skills, I hope you've got some control over your social anxiety. I hope you'e able to focus again. And I hope for soooooo much more. But baby steps. You've got this lad. If anyone does, it's you. Cause y'know, Ethan hates being complacent. But what do I hate? Well... "I hate wasted potential, It crushes your spirit." Make sure you keep reading them self-improvement books, meditate, work out, watch Motivational videos, inform yourself about mental health, watch Jordan Peterson, Dr. K, Psych2Go and Sisyphus 55. Stay happy! But above, don't be someone you're not. Because that's who I am. And that's not what I want. Please, Take Care! M. P.S. Have I cried anytime during this next year? You know we haven't cried in 3 years. Maybe If I cried I could let loose a bit. Lmaooo

Epilogue

about 10 hours later

To the "me", who had lived in the year, one previous.

We've come far.

I'm thankful, for the fact that you wrote this letter.

Truly, I'm grateful.

Over the last...

Nad ta iestm ercid ey,ra a ynam ltu,gsrged letf ew solt.
Tub srpevdreee ew.
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Ttse ,ridvngi 4 teasrtd msiet faret tbeial i afligni nlalfyi the ngdviir. Im' e)awra essgrmai,(barn.
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Lguetgsr st'i in dhar mmseioets t,eiivnrsyu i tlsli. Oru ,sesetrem tub tcjuebs esaeucb serpnte i im' hte of r,oem latpry tnwa aamilfil eno eaucesb owrk olny gdino to omeh ssseiu hsit asol fifnatcge.
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Gepsikna w!kor i jbo! a trestad of.
Yamifl ni ndg,iae orf to lartgfeu orf hmuc ew wrok is the dan sa krowgni grleon it slresoveu pnxeeceire cnie im' ee'wr iouetpiotrpsn ,bsusiens eth sa no t,unlyhaklf.
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Rs,tnegsis ti gte ,erlo of a to trhwo btu tht'as a ni sioev?upr ta oru dad mrbrmeee nad trnrcue tlo awirlay ewf nefot ryase anwetd ob,ntleisrisyip seitm hatt oerpjct ievodlnv ti's my. 'erwe mtprinoat h'tsat lnergai,n as'wht dna.
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Gongi ilnfuyn on a rwotomor o,gnhue w'ree hyodial. Tirp ptnealar siupvoerins our wothuti rsfti. Nxgieitc, kown i. Dna eaork psegianor dhedea orf we'er ysad 21 to. ,hdmooa 5, be rogup dna va of itwh a mith zsma, i'ltl.
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R,psruise srresupi.
N'jaasp olweh exdeectp gto cg eodsrrb aws 'etb paj,an teh well ouy os but niegb og hhu? ernev ot taht i,cyk emant ailylntii asprdcpe ot htat wree. Ti ut,o ti oesm a ahtw 'nyko,w tulser, peploe is is as redpodp btu.
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As reev taenh ere'w hwit lilst sa lcsoe. I hcenga t'nod our ntikh oons dan ayd emti will ,1 thta yna. Atnw do i ro(n it to. ).
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Ydneit tmies ethm onge also solec e'vwe and aacbr we kvc,iy got a wfe wiht twih adn to aelylr cydup,xneteel. .
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Tquie utb wudlo tw,ih hatt veha uldoc peed dineyt sa anteh vhea waslay a nad eth giishfntlu epnsro heva efw i ltaks had i lhel i eb eben noyl uhothgt. .
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Wyspi esom ,jv at,sem daem a,nd we niu the yuo su,ebr urse,m msnkicena nad onwk udmar,st. On oogd erthe itlsl tiwh onunetfrlyt,au yro,eeenv a ubt remst tuo uyro asw liglnfa yrnvoeee ebnweet. Rlol nwko we yuo hwo.
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Rlleo,va.
'eisfl eotntg tetreb.
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W'eer we imgnka firdsen unf adn vaeh ew eomyn, evrwerhe nac eavh ew.
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Ois,stemem eilf lsutesfsr ubt t'ahts elif ?ynok'w llsti esgt.
Infglee hyprtae 'sntwa tihw uitq tale ahmecs adn tonnecc yaer, ew l'nutodc last i heaprip rhe.
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Gvetsyenrh'i utb trebet say otwn' i sit' prceet,f.
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Rw'ee ngirk(wo it tsill on sreesdde,p. ).
Sebt rtyngi nad our.
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Nda ghsnotmie ,oylswl e'ewr yerv is ivngpiomr ytrgin ist' lfveosl-e d,o ot lywsol.
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Mcren,ntsie allms stesp. .
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Ah'stt !tesrtam twha.
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Dtopeda leiv b!y lya,ifnl ew rpesha we a adn.
Rhtie ot eahc !won.
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Ot mrrebmee mkea rsue it.
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Olv,e mcuh.
Eno teh url,sfoye refutu ni erya.

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