A letter from Aug 11th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, hey its me you know yourself haha um im writing this to basically vent which is stupid since you know its your sweet 16 happy birthday though im proud of u for making it this far because right now it feels like i cant stay strong for much longer. i am trying so had to be strong for mum and scott they have been so happy with me the past few months because when i used to cut and all i always fought with them. i really want to pick up that blade again its so ******* hard so much is happening on this inside its so hard to keep it in. i cant talk about it with anyone i cant trust anyone everyone who ever gets close w me just eventually leaves. amber wants to bash me this friday, i miss cameron and ellah so ******* much it physically hurts i dont want to do this anymore work is stressing me tf out. i miss the old days not the fights with my parents but were i was with them all. they were here my old mates even though i hate them i miss them. i miss haylee i miss ciara i miss oceanne oh my god i ****** up so badly. im literally in tears i dont want to go on anymore. well u probably dont want to listen to me anymore so lets be positive :) HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYY ur amazing ur beautiful i love u i wonder what u look like i bet u look so good. how have u been? hows butler (the “new” house?) any new pets? hows ethan him and his gf still together? hows austin and sheniah? hows mike he doing ok? is noel still around? whos ur closest friend? got a boyfriend? haha enjoy ur day :)