A letter from February 13th, 2021

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, HAPPY BIRTHDAY...how does adulthood feel?...i hope you are having an amazing birthday...and ukw even if its sad and bad it doesnt matter just reminisce the fact that u got to 18..like wow...where r u? ...how r u?...i may sound like an over excited teenager but thats wht i am and i hope u still r too...i dont know whether u will even read this but **** u got this far and i hope u r pursuing all ur dreams and even if u arent its ok cuz god has something amazing in store for you...never lose hope no jokes...and i am hoping u lost weight and ukw even if u didnt u are still pretty babe....as i always say beauty is in the eye of the beholder....i hope u stayed in touch with all ur 10th grade friends and family...even those insta friends...if u havent talked to them in a while then just ring them up..and if they r blocked...unblock them and talk to them remember the good parts with them forgive and forget....i know u probably dont need advice from a teenager who cant even handle simple problems and has a really messed up mind..but just know this teenager in any age will love u the most and will always be by your side...i hope u r still reading that smut..and enjoying life to the fullest....and u r praying and practicing ur religion..idk wht u have experienced by now or wht u are experiencing but just remember it shall too pass...time will heal..and i hope u didnt do the mistake of falling in love again until or unless it was halal...(in case u got married and have a baby,as uk as a teenager right now thts my fav dream, just drop a kiss on both their foreheads from my side and tell them i already adore them and even if it is only a husband give him a kiss and tell him this too).....and if none of this happened and u r just tooo focused on ur career thats great...best of luck on that and i hope u are passionate abt it and arent taking any **** from anyone...be ur own boss lady and earn money ALOT of money...and if u have neither nor career nor ur own family...then be glad u have urself and ur siblings and ur parents...and that u r alive..have friends...food and shelter...you are you...uk u r that girl who never needed her beauty nor brains cuz u had a way with people cuz you were just meant to stand out..as you will...things maybe be hard as hell right now or maybe not, but just always have hope, and if for no one do it for Amal or whoever is ur source of happiness at that point in life....this is rlly difficult to write uk like i am already so bad at writing and then not knowing the future and knowing how dramatic my life can get..its hard like what if u r going thru the worst and me writing abt these good things is depressing you or wht if u r happy and these sad remarks r getting u bored or u feel like they r extra..idk bro ok, i tried i just want you happy and content and if u arent tht then become that ...dont let people drag u down well i have nothing else to say...enjoy live laugh and love.... love, ur fifteen year old self

Epilogue

about 21 hours later

dear 15 year old shaima,
i love you so much you mean the absolute world to me..sometimes i tend to forget how insanely kind and...

Ngueine rae yuo. . . Ehatr si lyllteari eadm dgol tou ruoy fo. . I uhcs hsiw keil a usdno ouy ocdlu i be sfriend hitw renpos uyo ecni. . . Hsalclyyip you everrfo you em drseie becaues ntdo ubt eisxt lwil iwtihn ltoatunynfeur. . . Elaiv itaehrnbg raecl nda anewrs otn tjsu im uyor royu stiuqenso dustbo to dan. Ighh telf ym swoer a i ienaxty tmigh i rhaienpoizcsh teotng kinht tineelyifd sronsepeid adn veha erays eubscea avneth gnairg heav i ni orerisdd nnngifuotic i eaivl neev has npaci. . . Scyophiss no heste nmdi intpo go eopsdsie het trteear i rhut of of ot ot ndte itre hatt ym. . . Zuari ot leaviun etrdi ohoswem i tspo tsaltae ymelfs fylesm or ubt iev odes eemviyert. . . Tinkh ddi enver a i ta i vhae nda iths tndo no iyf ptoni imlyfa i ldouw i envre. . Strhu etbearh it os tsomsmeei yelonl ma i to nvee. . . . Na ecin noiolccsayla si ngyou wgorn sah nda ptreyt sppvoreitu tctesu akem amal the i gdoo fele eb too gilr ptou azrui i slayluu maiqs. . . Oinnhgt nda dda umtraa teh mmo eyvthe ot detorulb egniv neseg nda dda boatu em syta nad eavh rae i omm. . . I slto eryvolibrca esoidicns i si itrde weer henw olgn aedr you ofsureyl caytlaul so uoy hsti ocedluv yuo to tebetr you isth etfeifn aemk pheo ihktn neohgu eoerbf so. . . And you ourfseyl rcae ntygri pkee veol to teak iselm fo i. . Epoepl "ilem!s eubes"ca hwne icen teyh kool.

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