A letter from December 1st, 2020

Dear FutureMe, Hey, its been crazy hasn't it? As you well know, a lot has happened since I last saw this. Something I want to tell you, you have gotten through this, you have made it!! Great Job. You will be eighteen when you see this... if I haven't made it through everything, I guess this will be a letter to my parents and family and friends. Dear FriendsNFamily, Hey all, don't mourn my death. Its nothing worth crying for. Whether I am in hell or heaven, just know I love you all and you all are amazing. I am alive in your hearts, so live your life to the fullest, okay? You have got this. To my grandparents, you all are everything I could ever ask for.. You are the best thing ever. I am so thankful to have you both in my life for as long as I have lived.... Nana...PawPaw...you have got this. You can make it through this...I love you both so so so much. I wish for you to continue to succeed in life. You deserve everything amazing in life. I love you. To Andi, Hey! Keep everyone straight for me will you? You are the best at keeping people in their places. I love you, Andi, Thank you for everything you have done for me. You are the best step mom/mom I could ever ask for. You have kept me in line and I really appreciate it. Don't feel defeated because you couldn't stop me, be relieved that you don't have to worry about me anymore, aye? I love, you mummmmm!! Thank you for the being the mom I needed when my real mom couldn't do it. To Ian, thank you for being a good big brother, I really appreciate you listening to me when I needed it. I love you, bro. I am in your heart always. Dont let this bring you down anymore than you already are. I know you, you go this. To Weslan..Hey little bro, take care of the family for me. You got this. Love ya. To Dad, You tried. You tried but didn't succeed, it sucks, right? You wont have to fail with me anymore, Dad. You wont have to worry about me anymore either. Good Luck in life, Dad. My goals for you are these: Stop Smoking.. Lose some weight.. Get more active.. Stop making excuses for why you can't do things.. Don't cuss Weslan.. Treat your family with nothing but love and respect.. Listen to the family when they needed.. Dont judge... Slow to speak... Be a person I would love.. To Friends and other Family, Its not you, Its me. Stay strong. Live life to the fullest.. I dont know much more to say because I know all of you can get through this... To Just Family, It wasn't just all of you who did this to me, I felt worthless when I was around you all...Like none of you even cared. I would be surprised if any of you even came to my funeral...When I was alive, none of you tried to contact me, You were blinded by your own desires, maybe you were frightened as to be near me for it may bring torture due to me being so much like my mom.. You could have at least told me that. Yes it would of hurt...But at least I would know and at least it wouldn't have hurt as much as you all just ignoring me fully without an explanation. Now see where it has gotten us all to. I am dead. There I said it. I am DEAD. Its life and death...not just life. Now that I have gotten that out of the way, I want you to know, I have forgiven you, I have let it go. You can forgive yourselves if you care as much to, and live your lives, continue living as I was never there. It shouldn't be too hard seeing as you all have done already. :D I have forgiven you all, I love you all and i really hope you do move on and live. You all are strong, beautiful, independent, did I mention strong?? Because you ARE strong. You got this!! Good Luck in life!! To All, I love you. Good Luck. You all have got this!! GoodBye. Duffy