A letter from June 25th, 2020

hey future self, first off, you're turning 18 tmr. so happy birthday dummy. i'm really glad i found this on tiktok. and im genuinely curious to see how different the world is a year from now. secondly, congrats on graduating highschool. that's a big ******* accomplishment and you did that. so be proud of that. just know a year ago today you were uncomfortable and mad as hell about your shoulder surgery, so i really hope you didnt mess it up more and recovered nicely, it isn't worth messing up your whole life, i think youre smart enough to realize this. i also hope you're happy and maybe did that thing that had to be done haha (you know what im talking about, just ******* come out already, if someone saw your saved tiktok videos theyd think you were the biggest lesbian anyway smh). And, your mom loves you. she's just a crazy hormonal woman like you so its ok to bump heads. remember to be confident and optimistic about your future because i know its probably a lot to process. i guess by now you know your college already, which is crazy to me bc i dont have a clue yet. wherever you go, whatever you do, i hope its good for me :). and i hope you continue to keep soccer in your life because you love that. also im not sure what tense i should be writing in but lol its whatever. remember to love yourself and be kind to others, and have fun when you can. im scared for the future but i probably said the same thing before, so im sure it will work out. im not sure what else to say but i hope you smile reading this, and i know you'll appreciate this when you're reading it. and if you're crying, wipe those **** tears. if you need to tell someone something, TELL them. if you wanna do something, DO it! live your life b , dont disappoint me now. also remember you don't have to confine yourself to a specific stereotype, just be you! ps- you better have started learning american sign language. and if you havent get off your lazy *** and do it now. love you always, bye hoe - j.a