Future Me

Dear FutureMe, This past week has been brutal....rock bottom. I have finally come to terms with the fact that Michael will never be mine. I haven't been eating, sleeping, crying a lot all the time. At 34 yrs I can't believe what this has come to. Almost 3 years of growing so close to him, only to have to rip myself away from his grip and move on. I can't imagine my life without him in it everyday. The only power I have is the negative power of withdrawal. If I do not withdraw, then I have no power. And a relationship that has negative power or no power isn't a relationship...it's a bond between master & slave. I hope next time this year I do not think of him half as much as I do now.