A letter from May 13th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear future me, Hey girl! I just wanted to see what's up in the future. It's currently 2:24 pm and I'm sitting in the kitchen and writing this letter instead of doing my book project. I have so many questions to see what's going on! You are currently 15 at the moment and I know life is hard. Well present me is going insane during this quarantine. I've did some stupid things such as order a shit ton of online things and gave myself a tattoo of a triangle with a needle and some pen ink (how is it doing btw) I've made some hard changes such as dropping choir (which I loved so much) and added principle of human services. I didn't want to do it, but we got into cosmetology and we need those credits out of the way! How is that going btw? Do you still want to be a cosmetologist or did you change your mind for the millionth time? Come on girl make up your mind!! Now we are going to more of the personal questions like did you get your first kiss yet? I know embarrassing but I have to ask it's not like I'm kissing anyone during quarantine... Or what about boys are they any boys you like that aren't like 5 years older than you? Are you dating anyone? Do you still have those dreams about meeting the one? Do you still feel like you're not enough? Is your anxiety getting better or is it getting worst? Do you love yourself? Have you lost the weight or get a big booty lmao? (this letter is all over the place omg). Do you still talk to Alicia or did you drop another best friend? I hope you didn't because I really like her and she is like my sister who understands me and doesn't try to raise me. What about Makayla is everything good with her? I never want to drop her she's been with my selfish ass since forever. If you did slap yourself in the face because you are an idiot! Anyways if you are having a breakdown breathe! It's ok to talk to someone about your problems. Everything is going to be alright. I have faith in us and hopefully 2021 is a better year because well you know how 2020 was. Do we live in a RV park now? I don't want to I want to live in my house. Is Michael less like a dick and let's you do what you want? What about mom? Is she toxic still? Does she call you names or is she getting better? Do you still have a weirdly obsession over Ariana Grande? One more thing don't and I MEAN don't tear yourself down anymore or do stupid shit to get our parents to notice. Like calm tf down one day we'll hear the words, "I'm so proud of you." It may not be today, tomorrow, or next month, but one day we will. How is your writing going btw? Or did Michael ban you from writing like he banned you from everything else. I swear one of those days we are going to snap at him. Anyways I have to go girly mom is coming into the kitchen and I have a feeling that she going to complain about something like she always does. -Love yourself <3 PS: JUST BREATHE AND CONGRATS IF YOU HAD YOUR FIRST KISS ALREADY! OK I'M DONE EMBARRASSING YOU THIS GOING PUBLIC BTW SORRY NOT SORRY

Epilogue

over 1 year later

Dear 14 year old me,

WOW…OMG WOW

so i never responded to this until now. um it’s the last day of 2022 and now we’re 17 YEARS OLD! I know...

Hhaaahah lod ryve reew' ew. Wsa a uebcsea oww i yczra os hgih sanmrfeh ihst ynoug but ni hosolc just ieltlt is. Oruy wsrnea me my hiws ewre otsnqeisu lsepbrom i eatsndi tle tlsli mu ubt ohtes.
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Ti canrroyt dan acyl!ault ni jinoru akte great fi,eebl nda tkae toh !mya leba wre’e adn ttes etgysoomclo d’tdni !ti of eathc ayre take lpaorpu tub vahe roseompho rnietwt eayr baeeusc levo eht ot ew a si si yuo esh oyru to ew it uyo rewe ophgin inogg ot nmazgai atueaiqnrn nwe.
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Nigog for in did w!no i tub nnsguir my rsnue ee’wr fal!l og a ot icstecom a ngiog pluohlyfe imest ’rewe be ot lyclaatu hloosc eht fwe ot imnd aecghn.
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Ti ruo dnaik idd wiht agian kin ,ti lol ae,nlk it do uns alcualty oru bmud tub waya npe ttatoo fdae vyre eekw no aayw a yare tdeocureh totaot lutaalcy na adn omohperos but a rtafe ikn idd dfade ouy a klnae isht up ew a it to eddcide mtei oyu ltinrgae iaed utb aluact eth neleed is nad. Naksey yver a ti uyore’ wsa ont atrle omm tbw bc omthn. We osal tchiec nor…jotiuo ays yrae eht ptumse ot slaet dha lweih a a rof dan saw.
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Urgisysrlipn aoutb kssi, we newh a yarlle rou we …anda otl !16 of fo heort 0222 i pndeahpe rifts tifrs tca’n na,lptsiehori tfsir btu ogt lakt lto trifs rwee. Arey aahhahah tno ti erya of eht aym oru eneb aws tbu ahev tisrfs byo.
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A anwt’s oasprlienith ujts taht asy byo ihtw dan tsifr uosy…rbo ’elst. Rtgshtai came iiscrs irnsgsuirp nto a to niraunteqa i iundgr wnko oesrmpoho oncnicolus aery het ubt ttha edrnu we dan ’erew ntew nad. Ilutn a okwn rtpa fo kwne maen leyrla i wno me utb walays n’tdid i. Os e’rwe l!ieubxsa.
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Ryea my lsef dlo asy naidk also gnl ot hwchi zycar a erwe’ ot sncab-oer bniigr-ecnvia1nsng4not-- idkna heo is. Big hahah)hhaaa cntaromi (btu ’erew a poeelhss istll.
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Eetdab ixnuosa nirguslsyrpi ew lyrael in rea e’rwe no!w nsaiuox oynl yulaaltc the hte ti e’ewr utb s’ti so sey utb ew afs yultaalc dna kown essl atbou neherewv teh enyoj stlil i tneixay, time cyrza.
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Ielk hrete cbhti is be nteh inojru aoultmes ash ayll yonl pinao but a meas uyo os asdi wokn rf niesc adn she’s eidnfr tlsil to btes flte enw sbte our laly evha het b!eesit i eno id,ut)sp ayer uoy in and klat iaiacl we atth hch(iw is sey a uoyr eg,ard dan utb woh taicnlpo eben aws i h6t for iesrst y!lla oulcd we fnired atth sti’ konw nrfide uroy. Ti’s and aaiilc !f!eli llya rof ouy.
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Gklntia eornm,ya her ehs amyakal odlt pu adn tno dna cukfde eecasbu tuboa si nteinmo us esmo to sroean erh wno a htta esh ew hpermsooo fernsdi tppsode i our dlie itwh eray r’ewe dna hist for tndi’d. Aplgpnis fc,ea e’ssh veeressd on im’ sfemly iarl ohw fseinrd ni het otn a. .
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Nlitu aws !rgeta ti ahtt doog teim btu 0212 hotre a tgare eyra ylelra ouy athn ): aws epdaphen adh jornui.
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Eekp su nad shit lamtso i sldo le!aritr utb ti eshou rfo ot vmoe we a elvi ulykc utinl on’td iedcdde ,eray in tfufs ioyfliclaf ew os hte out.
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Etropy! a erew’ teha trwie ytpore teerbt eiwtr lto lol but spuigrsrin ti aullytac ovlsen ew ew odnt’ ,noaymer ta kwon i cllatuay you.
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Uboat i rllyae laderya eyabuscoe…u nokw not’d lkat tanw mchaeil to.
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Nda eetr,bt a eayrll a altlayuc mom anem tilsl is digno aeicdnct sujt hs’es btu oll hda bad arlely hs’se seh lot llsti naem.
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Nwe roalty t,sill iswft tbu wno iaanra ruo we danerg aautclyl evol ssiosnboe si. Simcu we tbu dle oot rye evol aslo eys lnaa.
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Yuor won yb opts het nhtinikg tihs pu atobu all shi:t wanerdes fo em igydn oiuqssent gsiayn donw predpwa dan lwso freutu tle i htat. Nwo ndee yoeslrfu si and uoy oufceds jtus to feil on it tgrhi as. Ot sopt dna vneer usjt w(e lacm be neyska ar)nel nyigrt ndwo. S,ortw ulbtayrp msehfran ayre eray het ti yaer i ar,ye was poeomsroh oresni edned bset ,oknw nruoij our asw and si ihst. Alearbod ts’i adn ceut tsap to aobtu i drvyaeey ehnw yuo od was eaelv ni btu tmie ssmi adn ohw hte oyu i i adn tkhni 4,1 i saw leraly you. I utb hpleed anqnartuie ma dan uttiwoh i t’dno egcnhda tsi’ aols ieodcsvr shit i swa tlao bwt be hnkit ldowu sopnre su owh su i tanqrieaun. Abrpylbo ro ilstl eb i’d lhel eth toemngihs etlssoc ni.
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Is’t miss rfo but ewn yes tub a tapcerh oyu i teim.
I geofriv you.
Epek me year etcu 41 bigne lod.
Het uuertf ofyrlsue vo-le ni.

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