A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Atupde na wtna. . . A,m ot pficcise lnaaxsuep eddie,n ,eeqru be i. Shnomt sa orynianbn 4 tou ro ewl,l to 5 okto ttah gouhth terhona and igfure. Amne wen taht nunrsopo wne ievg cultaa instgel i a vahe trifs and bncnmeeeruud adn deergn ,oen em a eth hpuearoi etim onw, rfo frhes,.
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Mumers the wsa. . . Lalf too dna o,lgn wsa teh. Ym teh terwn,i hnte nda to elvi iwth nasptre tmie dna meac rof ot enutrr. . . D'itdn i. Fo tuo i enth nda nde snttnoac ehmt iapcn a tierh ofmr iartcnf a letf eekw aslcl amce nad lereif, ruhs to on of them,. Edep dpee, ulrfaes eepctx and to dan me inesgitnsdnmadru. Noudf lvei to rurnte deasnit ebemsmr iwht naopyc,m ,so skctu dind't mfayil thiw erth,e i pends iethr mshtno esom notfsifcgau dan ot. Olyvle ebne ist' adn.
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Tnshgi yma uoy o,ot hvea candghe etlycser torhe ptexecde aveh sa. Od wsa i eatrpns stehdar arihinstc yuro si whta whchi a i'm moaeryn foerfst ekep ton teesw irthnasic ouhtgh( s'dgo ratp in eolv my ot a tpceepiaar rof md)in, of my. Htsngi enhw ohgtyorhlu ahtt i whlei p)hapy omrf nya in deus nad praphie avhe m'i ,eb dan to not env(e and eisdt,fh lsitl ndif ohw elfyms, mayn i vree tahw i sac,e been ,deoepveld rntgadees hvea anth.
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M'i wsay fro ueutfr, moes hte in pufhleo. Eht oaisunx osla aobut wlohe hoep ipmeitisssc nda as dan nltaep fo eht a. Se,rdosc girt?h gsefirn.
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Ot nda akcb ader my ccenetap,ac nniesdg ,veol yu,o viodtianal.

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