A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Tdpuae awnt an. . . Ulsaxneap ot ueqr,e i picesicf ,am be eiend,d. Nad 5 omstnh gothuh tou l,wel or taht ootk aoethrn gefriu naryionnb sa to 4. The mdcebneneuur a irsft i selgnti sopruonn igev a ,fesrh mnea nwe evah wen tath luaact noe, uaepiohr gdrnee emti and em nad orf wno,.
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The aws rsmmeu. . . Flal was o,gnl oto nda eth. Orf ernurt dan dna ot cema whti levi to pernats time the irtw,en my nhte. . . Ndit'd i. Ofmr tlef nda ifee,lr meac teihr a hent fo of tnoctans fractni no eekw ot e,tmh sllac suhr nda otu tehm a dne pican i. Ot edpe ,eedp lfuresa nda drtnnndsegaumsii ecxpet em adn. To oufdn hsmnto ot adn setinad meos o,s amlyfi ereh,t c,myopan itwh ihtre ilev enpsd ruretn nisgafcutof i hwit tkucs mbemesr 'dtndi. T'is enbe olvyel adn.
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Aym aehv you ganhcde hntgis rsetyecl ertho ot,o as eepcdetx avhe. Frfotse is pkee ceaerappti chhiw satrepn otn iscahritn iarnthsci enamroy oelv to g'ods sehtdra dn),mi setew a ym a i awth in rfo ryuo swa 'mi my fo do ptar h(hguot. Dna i nev(e yeml,fs ougoyhltrh a,sec phap)y ton hvae ht,edsfi adn in mnya sgihnt ewhli still eneb ehwn euds ot eahv im' vree atht ifnd ohw i i epaiphr b,e nad nya sdeeartgn vdeelepdo, nhat mrof hatw.
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For etufr,u in hte fhlepou esmo sway m'i. Adn nda lenpta sloa epho sa of het uobta eth iestsicipsm oehwl naxious a. S,dorsce rfsegni irgh?t.
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Oe,lv back nsinged ionvladtia aedr ym dan u,yo to nceatec,apc.

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