A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Cna 201,2 xlare yuo.
Ot lvie llcatayu we yera uor ecabues ,olleceg i oedmv ,aorynme nu̇sbaitl ni ̇zirim 'tond seatnpr the stetrda. .
Izlyıd eht hg,int soo,o iekknt uyo ni tgo shre'e to. Ton but het haepnp to gimeina saw douwl in you vene it shitng. . . . Ni nysgtidu lsaeungag eu'yro hteer. Onwk yuo ?ahwt dan uyo rnfhce edlaren.
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Whit uoyr rmdo you treiw limes 'roeyu feac uyro a in tihs tub ot no ot room mofr ads rpom the og ggion 'cdoutnl efacrn.
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Hte sa 'ouery ktnhi uyo ihwt of ayn eobav in otn tqunrefe as occntat nmeas. Vene eno slot ouy mthe fo. Dsesgeu ): taht gtihr.
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Go ot uoy olunct'd ogt were ouy mdriae,r ni gdidnew afecrn yaenr scb eht.
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Ahs seh lpace laci̇l a ot iun slcoe n,fie is. Eb cn'lotud oyu mthe otg tow wtih ubt guess nui esbt aesm oyu tnio of ehret yad rfnedi semo teh hte taht ecah teh w'dtluo uyo fo hstero.
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Godo gnöçke is. Hse neretd a mluağ ni ueohs. Htiw tutku hse etreh isetuds. Mih ntddi' ubt tey oysrr, uoy teme. Lceso yda but meso.
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Izmṙi aabir ssitdue in. Ot ees uoy tatoncc inaga ṁziir otg artef 'reuoy u'dltocn rhe utb evlae yuo ni.
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Uyo eon ese iwll altlycua daeus yda. Bgien i tfca a iths llwi ebt uory blwo inmd. Yuo ese tddi'n omgcin wokn i teshe.
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Ouy ti nwok locd i slnibȧtu dias uaotb uyo hnwe be dna githm gatkiln rwee. Dasi us i eher dd'itnt tath you and nya tbu liccapefylis bvlieee caple elad mn,ae. Dneur raefnc wiht eth hreweta na reegzinf ot rzoe ntrheorn. Locd fanecr to i'st cnrie ausceeb be and os in uchm in t??w??f.
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Papneh rglsugtse. Lsta the ni reays htye dpnpahee 5. Ar,dh ouy too had utb with many fidlrte mayn kweodr esbrwnadko ppolee nmay. Risteap etrihe ot and uoy ltso btu lsto of etwn recid uyo. Ruyo coytrnu vedom dmea 'tnulodc nohatre of utb tuo os eiotmss,em of ebd ouy twih you olas eno siedrfn sbte ot dsa ogt uyo lppoee. Wkno yuo neev notd' oyu and her owkn ain?ag htaw ety. Oury in is irhtg? not shti eevn msda,er ni.
Obtua kwno runcyto to yuo trtousi a csaeube ggnoi it eenv ouy thnik i n'otd tond' hrwto ehoantr as. .
,is uoy it tnghi ohrwt teh. 'loyul ouy owryr tanh ntod' voel t,kihn yueorsfl oerm eevn. .
Lkie ruoy dlievbee you ouy ssntipodia nttd'id ed--a8l-frosyle. .
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Yrev etdir yuo it gusse ouy lpbl,yciu atedh ,hssiu i. Suish tath you ot ecseuba anre newt masold'dnc faert teh het hpso. .
Ehlstco i cna i ,uoy l'il as fro refta upt amek meos a arel hktic on aelng sa sonw nsoo. Here i it i lsle heyt >:( hte abescue rohbugt o'dtn me sceni lsmle ogc,loen it cna tiwh tvilaunyorl loas ereh lltis.
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Dgoo dan asw 19 ,asyllt. Eadm 8 19 yuo at rnfesid wen. Ddi eesl thye too elki lpedeh eno no ouy. 'ryeuo si seclo 22 o,nw 32. Nsfrid,e lcselesu abtou ot nigkam fyouerls isltl new imrvepo ryt illts eoyr'u file dan eyoru'. L,eft teh oe'yvu uhcm reev llesaubpi tginh btu ese yrve hs'att lyl'uo otms.

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