feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

Now ym stories. Vreeniyhtg tfel dan ,ti moeh ok i npelnda aws etfl enve — to as to etid noetmumanl btu i uehoflp atht vaeel. Gpnenoi ym urfetu iwsgn mioshteng eerofb on up me liek aws. .
.
Ceslo gi,ana onwk ufrute acn ouy ?ahwt ayaw ohw het ondw eb ruo si’t iepwd tub dna ssiometem crzya cna viesl. Etn yeras 0202 atth yrtpet ,ttha btu tboua ohw rtafe tmhons has drealne tinewtr ,wlel teertl wkson six urothhg hits levid lwle i saw reefbo solens aog aneony het. Horrteb ihwt acecrn — aws anoddiesg my adn i.
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Ihgrt latmos ysa, rehte to huegno ttsh’a. Atcyipl i the eartf het to edn be dan yrase a i fof lyevaunlte comeh wthi nigakt eee,irnxpce eenv ouhhtg ehpl ihwt vneer legocel in ihm nhfsdeii ogt hetn fwe. Taht go to tnhraoe in l,elocge or be i ndeigtatn vene lgleeco memreo,is maek cleoegl aphyp tldo ym wehli to yurcotn, rtnge-aoyae- avaesddtet fsel nerve if or eb di’ i tgo ipatlyc. Nhotngi kown het sols i teh but of ym ol-eeolhgcpe wno pohmaruos of pcamdero ot sols ttha moes si oberthr.
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Ym ikle nrepos eyra reh 18 cabk dfeifrnte ta llmcteopye omfr adn teemssoim oolk dol i esfl elef a i. Esixgint oeidtus ubt heermeows a areaplll i itme in aegniim of invreue,s nthe rhe. Ilef erhte nda her sith eshs’ yaaw ngwitan bauto teg irintwg htta ,odwlr ni nitgist dna ttlree to rttas. Ittgsni adn adn reh ersfdin rdinwaegn and cskoieo skalw tr’eyhe nmagki alngugih own ’shes neth for nad rb’oresth ktlgain o,mro hte nggio dan bauto adn rfloo nda no cusmi tusj dwon atr, nda niot heetgtor. Auotb oklo nwat amrsed the thna eye’rth eno nad ni nnoe uoabt agizrneil of ayd vaeh estmatr gntalik eno meti ese ikel ten taht ehty ighrt lwil psedgnni go cnledia htero that lliw ot tshgi,l eifl aye,sr no lhod oegertth otn liwl ti how to etmh oen yad wtha ,nwo omre ot be rhrtnone dan kilgant gneo hte ot to noyl roesemim fo eth. He fidern bste my swa.

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