A letter from Apr 20, 2023

Dear FutureMe, My current relationship? Can we name it lovers? friends? strangers? Of course not. It is not normal, it is different. Litteraly nothing but definitely not nothing. I loved him and I still love him. This eye contact everyday ***** me and means the world to me, it gives me hope, happiness, it makes me breath everyday and it makes me wake up everyday no matter how badly I need a good rest. This communication is so different and special, this language has its own taste, so ******* special. It's like snow at beach, weird but ******* beautiful, flying in a dream! Seeing you sometimes makes my day and sometimes ruins my day. I don't know if I should be happy or sad about our situation right now, sometimes I say any little thing better than nothing, and sometimes I say enough, it's time to make a step. When? Where? How much I still have to wait? Will I finally talk to you in a normal day not in a daydream? In real life not in a dream? I am waiting from you anything any sign any eye contact any word. I hope I come back and I tell you what happened in a day not in a dream.