A letter from March 3rd, 2023

Time Travelled — 6 months

Peaceful right?

Dear Me..... Do I juggle too many people? Do I work too hard to get on everyone's side? Am I selfish for wanting to be somebody to everybody? I am a stand in, a bestie stand-in. I am a sad little rug soaking up everyone else's blood and tears. And I won't always succeed in my job of fixing, and I fear the day someone breaks and shatters. Every time I find a new scar or am let in to see the inner damage of one of my self appointed charges, I fall apart. It breaks my heart. Because It's a constant reminder that I am not a long lasting fix. Just a little safe haven. So, if you ever feel alone, or need fixing, or help to feel less alone or forgotten for a while, I guess turn to yourself. Because we seem to be a good enough fill-in for everyone else.

Epilogue

about 13 hours later

Dear past me,
Dang girl. I am sorry for whatever you were going through. Sometimes I...

Htta wya do sltil fele. Aylwas and ot veha shgitmeno w,otrh saft veha but ew a ew hda slef eldh. It uandrsetdn terbet won we adn nvee. Eth anc senarws lliw haev love ew rty snfrdei tub lla we ehpl to ew nda ni veren rae naywya. Nad ko tahst. .
Rasa htwi ceja s,o adtyo pu is nbakerig. Ma otuhgh hmi erh nvee i leov ayw thgir tginh ,od arsdc,e it nodst eht to htat esh is for. Mih hes tub oesd lveo. Nto in sesh twhi hmi sujt lvoe. Ryev sryro i for jace ma. Lhnsotdu ned tyhe owser utb ythe ayw no ti to of tobh in a up thbo if wlil tasy leef mhet irnaotisehpl dnto adn ryt rltae teh msae ruhtngi oercf ahtt. Teats rfo nmaelt ma efrat hsi am cjae oseg bigrpya sujt ok, iths i and nda i reyhginevt gpnyari. .

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