Dear FutureMe,
Where are you right now? Have you received you SPM results? Did you confess to anyone after SPM or did anyone confess to you? Are you working part-time right now? Have you decided which path you'll take? What about the prom/dinner night?
I want you to know that I'm proud of you, always. Changes are hard to deal with, I know but also know that you can do it. It may have took you about a year to face the fact that you moved from SMART to TITAN but I'm sure you'll get better in dealing with big and drastic changes. You should cry more, there's nothing wrong with crying. You're not weak for crying, you're not soft-hearted and definitely not "It's not like you to cry." You're a human, not a robot, you have the right to feel things and it's okay to express it. The facade you've been keeping will eat you, be careful. Lots of things will start to change, the bond that you've been keeping is bound to be left in the past but you can always create a new one with it. It's okay, just... let go. You'll be fine, I promise. After all you've survived for almost 18 years now, right?
Keep yourself healthy, you have gastric so eat well, don't rely on meds too much. Same goes to your allergy. Don't starve yourself yaaaa! Exercise will you? You want "that" body after all, so put in some effort properly but don't push yourself too much! Keep yourself in check, stop worrying about things out of your control. Do what you like; drum, guitar, softball or dancing; anything just do it! Take your licenses, let's go on a trip!
I love you, love myself. So keep feeling the same, we will get through this together. Till then, I'll see myself out.
Epilogue
21 days laterHey,
I just got home. I received my SPM results...
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