The one thing I most want to know about my future is...
if I will end up with this boy at the end. If all of the pain I'm suffering right now will pay off. Because right now it seems like such an unnecessary burden that cant avoid. If I only knew it I would be much happier every day.
But if you already know the answer when you're reading this I hope that the answer to this question is my long-wished one. That one that kept me dreaming, that one that kept me imagining our life together.
If not, I'm hoping you are happy
I really do. I know how it seems. But I really want you to chase your dreams. To find a loved one if that person isn't me.
I'll love you forever and ever F. <3 You were the first serious crush that made me cry ;) And thank you for everything that you gave me. Those tingles, smiles, and tears of happiness and also of missing you. Thank you for that experience.
Goodbye,
Your crying past-self
PS. The day you are receiving this letter is his 22nd birthday
But you are 18 now. Try to get in touch with him, please. Just to say happy birthday. Maybe this time he will respond.
Once again, goodbye
PPS. And now, is the next day after. I’m trying not to think about how much time is going to pass before I’ll see you again my dear. And still, I can’t stop thinking about this moment when you made me laugh yesterday. Or when you tickled me so hard that I thought I’ll cry. And that moment when I realized it’s time to say goodbye to you and I can’t even hug you because it would be weird…
I don’t think it’s fair.
But no one said life would be fair I guess.
I’m hoping I’m better now
I wish I could read you this letter when it arrives
I think that’ll be all
Thank you
And I wish you a lifetime of happiness
And now, it's 7 minutes until I won't be able to edit this letter. So I'm saying goodbye, see you in 3 years.
To the person that's reading it,
I hope you've grown
Goodbye (the final one I hope)
A.
Epilogue
about 11 hours laterHello to the past,
This guy is engaged...
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