A letter from Sep 14th, 2021

Peaceful right?

hello im writing this instead of my school work hey mazo, this is rlly embarrasing but hey, its mazo, yk, you. i wonder if you still like the name mazo? your attempt failed, obviously, how would i be writing this? but uh you know, u ghosted everyone from tarlac and wanted to start a new life, but that kinda failed. are you still into chels? have you found someone else? maybe, someone that actually likes you? youre an idiot, you know, clinging onto someone even tho it hurts u a shit ton, but thats how u are, u like to harm urself. tbh i think i already sent a letter like months ago but so much shit has happened then so here we are. god, i dont know what to say? are you still in pampanga? dont tell me you went back to tarlac did you ever get diagnosed? if yes, wtf is wrong with you? if ill be honest, i feel as though u have like adhd or something, ur obviously depressed and u obviously have alotta anxiety going on. are you in therapy? you stopped recently cuz u weren't ready, are you ready now? hows kuya? mommy? have you stopped calling mommy mommy? its weird how whenever i send a message to future me i always mention kuya, when he probably doesnt give a living shit about me did your phone break? i hope not, its a good phone did you ever get a good pc? did you ever get the courage to ask for one? do you think you deserve it? i really want one rn but i gotta like pump up my grades first before asking for stuff, cuz, you know, thats just how your brain thinks have you edited any of the vids youve filmed? was it hard? are you proud? what are your interests? rn your trying to do art but got huge art block cuz u forced urself to do art for art club audition, its on friday, did u ever actuaally audition? or get in the club? youre also into mcyt, i wonder if you still are, and i wonder if your embarrased that you did. im into anime i guess? i watch it and enjoy it but not like, a fan that looks for art everyday or some shit. i wanna make music tbh, u wanna do alotta things, but u cant. this is gonna be a real annoying question cuz i know u hate this but grades? how much did you try? and how much did you cry? lol prolly alot how about ur current friends? rn its poi, chels, and akum, suprisingly. i dont really want friends but im forced to. did you get attached to your maths teacher? right now you really does not want a father figure rn ive been avoiding it with all my might. talking about father figure, how are the male figures in ur life? again, u rn doesnt want them, mostly just cuz you dont want to get attached TALKING ABOUT ATTACHED, how r ur attachment issues lol, rn ur "training" ur attachment issues, like, wtf does that mean (idk either) i wanna be optimistic and ask you how far you've gone but, i honestly think you havent budged at all, look at you, your procrastinating by sending future you a letter because what? the computer assignment is hard? wtf happened to gifted you mazo? sorry for the rant there favorite artists and song? rn u listen to cavetown, mitski, wilbur, glass animals, bo burnham, rex orange county, lovejoy, lemon demon, and artic monkeys. fav song is uhhhhhhhhhh i cant pick so most played song is probably heat waves lol. ( funny how you played heatwaves on loop 60 times a day as a joke months ago but now associate urself w the song ) how many songs has lovejoy released? any collabs? rn they have sex sells, cause for concern, taunt, and one day. ur fav is prolly one day out of the 4 cuz u memorized it already before it came out. play any instruments? i assume no, you wanna make songs but suck at instruments, why cant you get urself into it? idk either. pls dont tell me u made friends from school, this one girl is messaging you, prolly wants to be ur friend, ur better than this cmon any school clubs? i think im just gonna send shitty art to my art club audition cuz, what will mom do abt it when i get rejected? nothing. how rich are you? do u have a job or something? rn you only have money from allowance, did that even ever continue? do you got good clothes now? rn just a bit, not enough for 3 days tho me thinks how could i forget, covid? what happened? i rlly am happy that there will be vaccines soon for minors but i really do not want to do face to face, ur social anxiety is bad anybody die? idk just curious did you ever get rid of the bad habits? or trying to? are you mentally alot better now? hope you are big man. haha. i just called myself big man big man. hah how r u n chels? rn ur really scared of pushing her away because you tend to push away people you like for a long time because of, idk, annoying them? accidentally texting them a long message at 4am? oh yea hows ur sleep schedule lol, rn its ok but u had a breakdown on sunday cuz u couldnt sleep and u had to wake up early for school, it suprisingly worked and you passed out in no time. do you have a mic? dunno why ur so obsessed with having a good mic i know u hate topics abt ur bday but, what happened? did anything happen? do you still believe in love? rn its very much 50/50, well, maybe less than fifty. did ate zani and mom ever break up??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? idk just curious did u ever cosplay lol, or still too broke? or just dont wanna? rn u are a lesbian and genderfluid, how bout now? or like, then, or, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN did u ever come out to mom as genderfluid, or kuya? moms a transphobe lol i dont feel comfy coming out to her rn fav color? red rn heh im running out of questions, so maybe this is it for now, no i wont do my school work, r u crazy? one last question tho, i always ask this, hope the answer is yes, but, are you happy? anyways, hope your well and okay. signed, mazo - September 14, 2021 - 4:29pm

Epilogue

about 19 hours later

hello!!!!!!!!! it's funny cause I'm ALSO writing this instead of doing my school work..... some things never change I guess LMAO

hello mazo!!!!!!!! it's mazo, I still really like the...

Nema eys mzao.
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Tfrea ewre iths reltte tniwgir enst e'uoyv ttstaemp ,me htere rmeo a otl. Dlag that m'i entw rhhoutg :) eonn it to paphy yas m'i emht twhi fo.
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Be ikn'cuf tog mi' taht aleylr deus kidna eidlcopcmat yoru eovr rlie4f, hlsce to btu yallnfi !! amku. M'i it ym ot sitvoiep ytrign esstbet atubo toh sayt. . . . And iktotk 'hrsete temi lla on yuo gilr oi,nt shti s'esh as rallye bti yvre utjs fo het oto arf mte laos si ubt rtghi a wn,o buys tingh atht uore'y eth. If btu i or usre nac't nt,o ltle tion em ma es'sh. . . . . . I to i twan ,bygeul hre reh srfiden llte itwh twan hwo i tbu ot skis hr,e iwth naawn lsao ytsa vene het'rse mhuc ilcytrts. Ignbe na godo piogpsnt !i!i!!!!!!o!!!!td! obj no.
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I am pangampa ,eys in. Fidnesr nad itisv i hsoocl ot ruyo aalrtc ktep slatom old wetn im tub to kcab irtrnpnsitagaoc.
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Got s!!e!y i eon !!hdad gihrt yuo and otg dagodsnie ithw rneoipssde htat. Dahd i ym yuor tdrei sdme e'trewn htiw lcaemotbip but rof tgnaki yobd yhet. Yrt gaain it nanaw hte i ni ufuret hughto near.
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Ta nolg tbu o,ag teh dn2 not oot eyrptah tenw i noiesss to i pstdope. S'tin eyaprht yarlel for htink i em.
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Rhe ni clpibu :) im lcla nda mmssteeoi ubt erh i ear oymmm ymlots im nfie call ukya i iltsl. Gvie a ouy htis butao u,yo yrelal he akyu 'tsnedo tosp taht iigknnth eosd dsoluh. Nvee het hatt ouy leov !!!!!w!!!k!o!!!!!n!!! ot eh cresa adn it o,uy nad ni ihm he tyr ,oot yden out tuboa oyplrepr uoy eh eovsl oyu stju sndto'e pone sohw nd'to.
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To cesren ti patsn etryeasyd sutj// gacneh ott amcl dkceacr ehheewhheheheh tllis scuae ehay efni oercprott btu go euuursup tdsyeyera enwt wsa ownkrgi i yrou my.
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Bttree ntha cmhu so i,t ew npxade hmuc anc ialynlf ebtrte we foerb,e a pc nda no i'ts :dd rcvetiitay nac avhe rou !!!e!!!!h!!!ya onw od we so.
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U'ody sftf,u it vi'e logsv sjtu diteed fo sye aeylrl pislc nda tlo semag d: nad !! a rthso un,f nyejo t'si of.
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Mseteiosm g,itrau annaw rocingf ynol the nipo,a ): odtn' dan of !!!m!!!!!!!!!!!za!!o! eht uyo ouy yuo eb ud'yo jtus mkea elpyfuhol !!nos!o do ot lypa isllt o!!n!!!!!s!!!!s!!g! od stih salo uoy papyh yrofleus nr tar henw :d ,rsmdu onilvi optsdep i erha own oseucr kmae i os ar,t instumtesrn tho, to.
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Lalrey euov'y edsagr on ste enaeldr utjs rouy to bcak. Cseor sbaed hihg on etg a uyo ohw igfnroc no the steb no'se you olweh-ftsr yrou od adn to int's. Uoy voeerney slesragrde vseol. ):.
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Imss tidd'n tce?hrae o,lco htadatce etg h'se otlauhgh oot i hcum ot amht arylel 'im no'dt ym. . . . Fsgeuir thwi ruoy in ctoetnn mael got ero'yu yva'e :d tihrg efrgiu atefhr het onw ouy nda yoru lefi rlea vahe.
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?etrbte sssieu stuj tmhcaneatt dtn'o to egt yna wsoer ti ,rrwyo aoml aosl rou thb aols ubt mind st'i umch nt'od tdd'in heert ontgte tbu i a'tvehn ayp ti.
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Iemsitpicss ass yuo. Pu eud,d 😭 onw 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 igdon llwe hsut os os tgrhi nygainno ore'yu leilarylt uryoe'.
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'its moal ykao i undaetdrns.
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Mmmmmm nad ehheeeehhh tmrgoymneo olejvyo cseau hud aitrcc trtus ot eb nad dan b ot dan tfavueori nda nad otgsh dna of nad ayeh iabcs nad tesev mmneie myuym onbur gnso leiv'() dna laos ciryk trssait 'uoyer peho egorna lbiile i' ycal i and dan by adnrou mnsekyo xer bnuro nad rufieovta ahs a my dan gdoo dodie nem utb jarmo hgrit jufi dna akez rmas sheiil ete'hsr own kdi eebeeee sa.
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Wchhi ahs lssoo thnki oals aerselde eloyjvo esmo is i lloooooooooloooooolllooololocoooooolololloloooolooolooloolooolo rome ?bu?a?slm 2 wen. Imet uyor lla oen aooloama listl si tho dya oituefavr rlyobbapa.
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Kjer you insuttmesnr aylp 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i bsaasg.
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Oot kidan it kaoy bgnie nad chtyib tjsu saounitti ggnuair fo okya lirg eth tiwh why tsuj ddtenrnsau a etbs feslym anem rosyr ondicise ym i aahaahhawhhh o'uyre swa iltlte ilef eridfns waocdr ruyo i i st'i hitbc byo adem nr ma oreuy'.
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But datewn nheeppda i dan acitcipsmlnoo tasor ojin msicu ot alom btu.
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Aveh tefl to liek mic 006 bgouth mean ouy uecsa oyu yoru rgli a iptuds. . . . Tma is 001 ddddadn a d'not avhe veryadey laaewlnco jbo rn.
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Vaeh i msie cneetd ioma rn cehostl.
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Soslcho f2f d!!!!i!!!!o!!!!!!!!!!!!cv!! toms goign nwok st'i opre on ouy nad avelnetiib an lstli era.
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Negib yuo tiissmecips anogn so pots i'm noe deid hit no.
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Amrjo of bihast !!!a!!n!!!!!m! i tge gbi as tase,t of 'reew dan igrth nt'od evry we !!!!di!!!!!!!!!d! of nwo dir tmelan gto gityrn nkow rdi dba hetre i ot itgtneg oe,m,r r;wee. . . Tmei m'i ocsem tbu apycikn wenh eht hlilc. . . . Itknh how i mi' swa btu mchu reetbt erefob i ahnt.
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Lchse !!!!1!o!!g!d!!o! adn era rae uea nda oe'yur hss'e and and sgyu haypp ni ifsnred phypa uoy s'ehs ouy.
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S'it godo aoyk sonear wno tub for gtrih ma2 utb s'it but koay.
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A kwors it sjtu i stnpe as gicfknu pheo t'sle oyu liek 2k cmi id,as on 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. )wrtas be my (spl l'til tasl.
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Was my tarhbydi i i ispsde etha awth ihwhc ym em uuuutbt i lelyra relyal ayok it yrhaditb acsaseslmt oiptcs eisdnmr ufdon egretde oson adn tou me 'sit throe hant pnhdpeea escau d'tno my gto eberermm abtuo.
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Velbeie !m!!huc! i elo,v i i otn'd eieevlb otabu laerly oelv htta in ndo't hknit in or ti ton 'tis.
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Okya oepr yhae oth reethy' coles oaolomaaooaa otg mi rea okya ate inaz e'eythv adn calsl.
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Yuo eohpsep sdue gah oughbt ti nrvee foogy a iwg hha madn mfro hnet. Fi ntru i see eethr tnsiigt ill' euontdhcu oalm douanr giw tujs hte.
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'im aaeroc leiytxasu i aeblnsi nda eurcpmts enegrd nda ,eneduabll enefrldgiud the hbot for dna elhlo ma in. Ro omla or fxuoral 'tthsa lxueafc hting scicifellpya if a.
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Tbuao fo rd,yctile i o'tdn mmmm aellry ayn out elef ym ot hmte to! need dreegn i eth moec hant've.
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Rea fvreoiuat orlco we rf bdase lstli der so.
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I uoy aertf hte ykoa 'dont u'ncdlot wh ide rigwitn itchb ovle ddi siht kown iglut btu ok yrou adnts u ouy tfsu.
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Ti i :) ays uto -am- lla nanog at'hst m'i fngiguri.
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E'ewr oazm aoky. Lelw' ayko be.
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N,gdeis.
1,5 azom trespbmee 2022 -.

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