A letter from Sep 10th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, It's me, You. But 1 year prior. I'm writing this to see how far we've progressed. You remember the time we became severely depressed. Those 4 months, where we struggled to get up during late afternoons, just waking up after overthinking for countless hours until late. The nights we spent venting, through clouds of vapour at the sound, no, the sounds, so melancholic, it left you numb. We started schema-based therapy in June. We took a step forward to save ourselves because we knew that no one was going to be there to help us. When we were bullied for years. When we failed to meet expectations. When we were mistreated despite being kind. There was never anyone there we could share our feelings with. Times changed though. We became this emotionless block of human flesh, hateful, spiteful, but never vengeful. Hateful of ourselves, our surroundings and every aspect of our lives. We're not doing that anymore. It's time to start loving ourselves. I hope you're doing the same. I'm struggling. I do struggle, I do get demotivated, I do procrastinate, I do develop bad habits, but at the same time, I DO want to get better. So in one year, I hope things have gotten better. I hope I'm driving (finally). I hope we can travel wherever. I hope you went on the night city bike ride. I hope you have more self-discipline. I hope you're more fit. I hope you look hella drippy. I hope you have a better fashion sense. I hope you helped your youngest brother's transition into high school. I hope you've started to love yourself. I hope you've developed a bit of a passive income. I hope you've become more emotional. I hope you've developed more social skills, I hope you've got some control over your social anxiety. I hope you'e able to focus again. And I hope for soooooo much more. But baby steps. You've got this lad. If anyone does, it's you. Cause y'know, Ethan hates being complacent. But what do I hate? Well... "I hate wasted potential, It crushes your spirit." Make sure you keep reading them self-improvement books, meditate, work out, watch Motivational videos, inform yourself about mental health, watch Jordan Peterson, Dr. K, Psych2Go and Sisyphus 55. Stay happy! But above, don't be someone you're not. Because that's who I am. And that's not what I want. Please, Take Care! M. P.S. Have I cried anytime during this next year? You know we haven't cried in 3 years. Maybe If I cried I could let loose a bit. Lmaooo

Epilogue

about 10 hours later

To the "me", who had lived in the year, one previous.

We've come far.

I'm thankful, for the fact that you wrote this letter.

Truly, I'm grateful.

Over the last...

We trelg,udgs a nyma adn solt items edrci tlef ay,er ta.
Rprevedees tbu ew.
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Tste ligaifn 4 albite eraft tdaestr dirg,vni eth estim i vndgrii ifalyln. 'mi aisne(mbrrs,ag )rwaae.
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Elgugtrs llsit iy,svnurite eetmosims in t'is hrad i. S,eetmrse erom, ubcjste of usisse noly hmoe loas oru beuesac i krwo lafilima ot utb the pesretn 'mi pytrla noe ihst godin uebsaec nwta tcnffgeia.
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Rowk! a atstedr i pgaekisn of b!jo.
Wre'e as utergfla ncie ew teh ofr to n,susiebs wokr hte im' cmuh golren sovrlseue aimyfl iutptespirono ereexipcne ti si wgkonir rfo e,gdnia no fnlt,lhkauy ni nad as.
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Dda oftne nwadte suvrpoei? stmie ncrtuer plsei,yitrboisn ym htta a i'ts vidonvle etg bmermere ewf ta dna ti of tol tub ysare 'hastt uro lwryaia rtwho ssrsnt,gei ,loer in to a tpojrce. T'htsa and s'ahtw we'er naige,lnr titonrpam.
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Ydoiahl ngigo ,nuegoh infynul woorrmot on e'rwe a. Ftsir rou hitotuw rtlnpaea rtpi ussonpieirv. Onkw i geniictx,. Oraek 12 ot re'ew adys orf psoignrae eddeha dan. A t'lli av 5, opgur ,oomdha ihwt fo nda ihmt sza,m be.
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Sr,repsiu siurpers.
Tmaen scrpdpea ubt wlle c,kiy rorsdeb to to njp,aa panj'as ewer tgo thta ouy eolwh gbine be't hatt gc tnialiyli saw os h?hu venre eepedcxt eth go. Ti leu,rts si rppedod is oesm w,yokn' ubt out, a ppeelo ti sa twah.
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Htena wre'e vree sloce sa wthi as lstil. Meti any naehgc soon taht odnt' ,1 dna htkin uro i illw yad. It orn( i atwn to do. ).
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To ihtw arlyel dxly,neeceput stime adn geno thme a k,cyvi weve' gto wfe whit and ntdeyi barac slao coels ew. .
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Sa roensp i pdee i eitqu elhl evha nyol locud be had the utgtohh enbe ewf ywasla dan htta veah ouwdl i hvae atenh inutfghsil wih,t tub iytden a sktla. .
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Ew neickanms ,jv s,aetm ,dna er,mus su,ardtm nad iywps eht meso iun uoy ,erbsu daem kwno. A enewtbe oogd algilnf eyrnveoe was rhete on royu ,ovyeener out tsill ,ulnuetrnfyato sertm hwti ubt. Llro wonk who you ew.
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Rvleo,al.
Slie'f gtntoe etrbet.
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Dan ewre' y,meon avhe ufn heererwv ew efndirs ew nkgaim acn ew hvea.
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Y'kno?w oismte,esm tsslfeusr ilstl sget btu efil flie sh'tat.
Quit ew tclndo'u iwth elta reh mahces salt nigleef 'twnas i tcecnon rpheyat a,rey dan priepah.
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Ysa its' i tcperf,e wnt'o beettr but hni'grevtsey.
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Owkir(ng ti on tilsl psdersee,d rewe'. ).
Tnryig adn ruo sbet.
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Itrygn si 'sit wlyols reyv groipnvmi ,od ot osl,wyl nad nmstgieoh 'rwee folelv-se.
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Lalsm sestp rsnine,cemt. .
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Astth' et!rmtsa atwh.
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Naliyfl, tdpaeod we by! adn a we leiv haspre.
Hace tihre to w!on.
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Esru make ebemmrer it to.
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Hcum e,ovl.
In eno eyar the turfue solr,efuy.

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