A letter from Sep 10th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, It's me, You. But 1 year prior. I'm writing this to see how far we've progressed. You remember the time we became severely depressed. Those 4 months, where we struggled to get up during late afternoons, just waking up after overthinking for countless hours until late. The nights we spent venting, through clouds of vapour at the sound, no, the sounds, so melancholic, it left you numb. We started schema-based therapy in June. We took a step forward to save ourselves because we knew that no one was going to be there to help us. When we were bullied for years. When we failed to meet expectations. When we were mistreated despite being kind. There was never anyone there we could share our feelings with. Times changed though. We became this emotionless block of human flesh, hateful, spiteful, but never vengeful. Hateful of ourselves, our surroundings and every aspect of our lives. We're not doing that anymore. It's time to start loving ourselves. I hope you're doing the same. I'm struggling. I do struggle, I do get demotivated, I do procrastinate, I do develop bad habits, but at the same time, I DO want to get better. So in one year, I hope things have gotten better. I hope I'm driving (finally). I hope we can travel wherever. I hope you went on the night city bike ride. I hope you have more self-discipline. I hope you're more fit. I hope you look hella drippy. I hope you have a better fashion sense. I hope you helped your youngest brother's transition into high school. I hope you've started to love yourself. I hope you've developed a bit of a passive income. I hope you've become more emotional. I hope you've developed more social skills, I hope you've got some control over your social anxiety. I hope you'e able to focus again. And I hope for soooooo much more. But baby steps. You've got this lad. If anyone does, it's you. Cause y'know, Ethan hates being complacent. But what do I hate? Well... "I hate wasted potential, It crushes your spirit." Make sure you keep reading them self-improvement books, meditate, work out, watch Motivational videos, inform yourself about mental health, watch Jordan Peterson, Dr. K, Psych2Go and Sisyphus 55. Stay happy! But above, don't be someone you're not. Because that's who I am. And that's not what I want. Please, Take Care! M. P.S. Have I cried anytime during this next year? You know we haven't cried in 3 years. Maybe If I cried I could let loose a bit. Lmaooo

Epilogue

about 10 hours later

To the "me", who had lived in the year, one previous.

We've come far.

I'm thankful, for the fact that you wrote this letter.

Truly, I'm grateful.

Over the last...

Tiesm y,rae aynm ew nad stol ggured,lst ta elft dcire a.
Epderseerv we ubt.
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Etaibl iinvdrg, lfayiln tterdas agfniil rafet i eth stte eistm rnivdig 4. Waer)a rras,as(ibgnem 'mi.
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St'i in eimstemos sitll te,yurviins i rhad ulggsetr. 'im i ihts ecbesua eussis work fo ot bcesaeu rmoe, semr,etes yoln tecsbuj ngdio uro famlilai ifagnceft eon btu slao atnw ehmo eth traylp ertspne.
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Setartd i of !boj rkwo! naesipgk a.
Sa on dn,egai uchm sa in we eoslvreus m'i rfo es,iussbn htaylnu,fkl isnturopeoitp 'eerw ot eht is nrokwig ufaerglt rokw nerxeieepc ofr ti ecin teh nlogre ylamif dna.
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Sesti,sgnr enfto biisnltiryopes, reol, ruo add ta get dvneoivl ni hrwto ym fo iemst nda sti' wetdna fwe tha'ts cjotper ot ti trcneur tub a ospieu?vr sryae thta lot eeermrmb ialrway a. And 'wtahs hat'st nmatpriot 'reew lnegirna,.
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O,ugnhe goign no a rewe' lnuniyf oyihdal rmoworot. Alaptenr srift ttiowhu oru irtp oniurvpssei. I okwn tngcei,ix. Ot aeork enpagriso fro w'ere dna dedhae 12 aysd. Tmhi eb aohomd, ,5 a fo il'tl whti pourg zs,ma dna va.
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Riurepss, prruisse.
Atht btu enrve na,paj asja'pn were bet' ot you ot hu?h iy,ck og wlel ttah saw nibge cg eexdpetc raepcpsd amten het tgo heolw drrobse iatlynili os. Ti si ',wynok ti epdordp but whta a elpepo ,uot si smoe sa rl,utse.
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Erwe' ihtw as erev tills netha as oslec. Gcnhea iwll i oru nda nya hatt yad tdn'o tmei nhkti 1, oons. It tnwa do to i (nor. ).
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V,icyk nad a llaeyr wthi ithw rabac oslce efw mhet ew got gneo nda tinyde enel,yetdcpxu eev'w to times loas. .
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Pede psonre whti, eneb uthhotg cdoul hatt vaeh ehll eb noly a i hda i ehva tlaks ewf the uqtie as and i sawyal tinyde gtshnuilfi aehv enaht wodul but. .
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Sipyw nncsmkaei ,uratdms a,stme d,an ouy adn osem eth se,urm v,j uni we maed rse,ub nwok. Utb a oogd no eewebnt asw eetrh fniagll smetr eoyrvn,ee yoru uto ,euntfnayurlto tslli htwi reeoneyv. Woh you nwko llro we.
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,vaolrel.
Gnteot ifle's tbrtee.
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Gnkmai haev nac er'ew yemno, we have we dan we fun dsinfer hrevrwee.
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Letsrfssu slitl omseme,ist segt tub eifl nw'k?oy fiel 'hastt.
Tasl eeiglnf taswn' we thiw y,era tdlo'ncu pirepah laet ehr petrhya heasmc i utqi dan cncneot.
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C,fterep ubt 'wnot asy 'tis nreyisvthg'e eettbr i.
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Eddserpse, n(ogrkwi tills no ti e'erw. ).
Dan ruo tsbe iytnrg.
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Si olslwy owslly, ot revy ist' hgnoemtsi ofse-ellv noprgimvi ,do ginyrt dan w'eer.
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Llams tescmre,nin sstpe. .
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Hatw rt!tmeas tthsa'.
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Adn pdetdao ew a srhape ew lyanf,il levi !yb.
Ot eahc !now rihte.
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Ekma sreu to it erebemrm.
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Hcum olev,.
Yoes,furl noe in refutu teh raye.

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