A letter from May 25th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, So I have literally no idea what to say, like what am I supposed to tell you, and where the fuck am I supposed to start off? What's your life like? I hope you're happy, that's the biggest thing I want. I also hope that you're alive and if you are congrats because that seems really hard for me right now. Are you working out, because dude you need to if ur not. Working out makes you feel good and eating healthy. It also boosts ur mood so thats a plus if you're still not happy. How are your friends? Still friends will Alex, Maddy, and everyone? How's Diana? Check up on her, even if you're not friends with her anymore. She needs you, at least right now she does. How are you? Are you eating ok? How are you feeling, are your days getting better? How's highschool? You virtual still? I hope your not, you really need to get out. If you have the choice to go in school, GO IN. I don't care if it makes you feel miserable or whatever, please go in, you need to. Push yourself to go in. Do you have friends? I know you've been pushing away your friends recently and have been losing some. I just hope that you have at least one friend you can talk to. Since you're in hs, what's it like? Is the middle school or high school better? Did you make friends with someone who has a car? I really hope so, Dad's an asshole. Don't trust him, as much as I hope you have a better relationship with him I just want you to be treated right. Is he manipulating you? Ask yourself that and be 100% positive that he's not before you even start becoming closer with him. How are your grades? I know its annoying but I want you to have a future. You still hate yourself? I really hope you don't, learn to love yourself if you're not already. It's hard but I hope that you're in a better place so you can. Are you still seeing a therapist? I'm playing modified softball right now, we just won a game against Harrison, 15-14. But because of my schedule I can't see the one I used to go to and now I have to see someone else when softball is over. Are you eating ok? Please tell me you're not starving or binge eating, if you are stop, you don't need to develop an eating disorder. Right now I'm procrastinating doing my homework because I just read the letter from last year. Me and dad still have a shitty relationship, he's awful and treats me like shit. He doesn't listen, ever. I have terrible anxiety, it got better and then it got worse. I might be gluten sensitive, might not have celiac which is great. It's been eight months since mom died and it still doesn't feel real. I'm pretty sure I have depression, or something of the sort. It's hard yk to just do normal things, I haven't cleaned my room in a bit, you can't even see the floor anymore, showered about a week ago, and it's still hard to brush my teeth, it just takes so much energy sometimes, to even get out of bed can be hard sometimes. PLEASE tell me Charli Damelio isn't popular anymore. Oh and Addison Rae, is she racist, transphobic, or homophobic? Is it all? Did I get any of those right? Has Shane Dawson posted yet or is he still gone? My grades suck right now, I have a zero in Math and an eight in Italian, too scared to look at the rest. Anywho, I hope you're ok and that life is good. I hope life is more back to normal too, my mental health feels even worse than sixth grade. Please take care of yourself if you haven't been. I love you and so do other people so you need to stick around? Are you reading this with anyone? If you are let them know if you're suicidal or not and if you're really ok. And let them know if you're sh, unless they'll tell anyone, because that will make it worse. That's it. I hope you have a good day, are happy, and are treating yourself better. I just realized you'll be almost 15 then. Holy shit you're getting old. And to anyone reading this, have a good day too and treat yourself well. Bye, love u. :)