A letter from October 28th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Hi, so it's 2021, wow. How did you celebrate this year? Have you visited your brother recently and did he try and get you to talk to your dad again? When you wrote this, you weren't feeling the best and you were going through a hard time with your mum. Seeing her cry made you upset, I hope you guys have moved away from the abusive people by now, you both deserve so much better. Have you come out as bi to your family yet? If not, that's okay, you're valid and worthy of love, no matter what trolls on the internet say. You've changed schools so many times, I hope that you like the one that you're in now. Have you adopted a dog yet, if you have, what's their name? . Which songs have you learnt on the piano recently? I know that you wanted to learn Lonely by Noah Cyrus. I hope that you got to see Matt and spend some time with him. I know people took advantage of your good heart last year, but you should never stop being a kind person, no matter how many people use you, if you haven't already you will find the right people, just wait. I wonder if we've found the book yet 'The truth about Celia Frost', you've been looking for it for ages. I know that we've always been quite shy and reserved, but this year, you could try and maake some new friends, you can do it, I know you can. I genuinely hope that you and your mum are happy despite everything that went on. I know you used unhealthy habits to cope with your depression, but maybe you've opened up to people and found healthier ways. I understand that last year was tough and you had a hard time loving yourself, but just know this, I love you so much and you do matter. You're beautiful, no matter what anyone says . I really hoped you enjoyed today LB and remember to not take things too seriously and have fun being a teenager. Love, Yourself

Epilogue

over 1 year later

Hi,
you celebrated with your mum in the garden, there were fireworks and they were beautiful. Your brother has visited recently, but it took months to get to see him...

Nagia. Tlsil ttah to h'es eh cacetdep i'm thwi huohtg hiknt tntcoca tnaw oru yan to ihm tno add, i ngiog ltska. Heav laosd fmro fo ouy ahev shoeu awya in lepeop ohste adn mreo losko dmoev guthoh) onw, a sptores louc(d eagtr ouy natpls adn nwe iwht and uyro do yuo hwit or,om ivel own it. Ot nto we hatt geurif dna uot imet seru we neh'tav hvae uto utb ew bi eocm are emnyo,ar yte w'eer. W'ere it of n'owt tmrtea ta mfor gieinbnig tbu dnki of hte stih hfiignsni lal osrew ton tog wn,o school os raf ry,ea. Yats enahv't gsnos asct sitll aerln to adn igogn ,dgo tub aindtgpo upeyollhf erew' relatn s!oon ylnloe, rtgsfnoei aonpi, odog yb dan odypllca at msooene ogns btu be elw'l on we ilnnareg eerw' w'ree eht lwyole eth enw gtniegt ot on. Mt,ie rfo itkhn a ew i tatynnreluuo,f tub eens oayk igndo seh' atmt ogln 'hveant. Dan siaerled and leylra lfsz wv'ee oru ldwro eben hsit we thwor inkwgor no elvserosu fofre ohw cuhm. Iedfsnr su sah ientgem erisela edpelh wen tsih sloa. Nhstlyeo erve llsit taht wlil 'eerw a i 'tdon rpeon,s cagenh dkin tnkih. Lal ton that ei'v eb hetm me ilek juts thgisn vere gtruhoh teh eneb rmeo amsek tnha ntreeiddme loppee to by. F'liuh'taf rdae hcihw fmhao,fn otughb we thav'en utb obko vldoe ew vhae amyn eht liek e,ty we so on,es iecal nmagaiz yb. Tlisl tbu bnieg nad igben i moer bene 'vwee ouignolaltlpayec 'rwee yonjigne ceti,nofdn nad leytal eilf yass wno dteri eydeiftinl leysmf ustj a reom vaal sh,y latk tlo ltyrnaula 'evi. Isndre,f nda ahno eew'v i(n nwe daem redor) owt taht and e,yrlntce. Erin,lfdy ahs sumic testa aigutr, nda si omrf dna she' nda poovrllie ynunf lyspa si adn eh ogdo. 2 sogn for ew us loas a fro y,asd erfat orf tytrpe mh,i oertw loyn is epseivrsmi hcwih nongiwk mhi. Ekil a matonnie,s rfmo levos reeiltns yhgtaphorpo ed,rateh hano di-kn egrta adn es'h si us. Dya we eb kiel me him, adn xfied kreonb and ot kame no hte efle to ntagddnersiun oeepnd i dna fstri ni'ttdd ewe'v' so dnedee asw pu he swa met. Oru tteber idgon onw, is noovmg mmu did leph. Slilt hes esh's rowinkg hoirlrbe hsa ni no ignth,s hgthuo wne men tstae. Fo tsih dey onse tstotao imgth did ym( nad nda cipgrein agmtine,hr ahtt wnok gientgt oto nad osrtw r'eew usemmr oh onk)w tuebaflui yambe oru i ew a hair gnnthiik sfa'ilmy we eonmtni i. . . Wlli odgo erd olko rkda ntginkhi :) m'i.

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