A letter from May 13th, 2020

Time Travelled — 12 months

Peaceful right?

Dear future me, Hey girl! I just wanted to see what's up in the future. It's currently 2:24 pm and I'm sitting in the kitchen and writing this letter instead of doing my book project. I have so many questions to see what's going on! You are currently 15 at the moment and I know life is hard. Well present me is going insane during this quarantine. I've did some stupid things such as order a shit ton of online things and gave myself a tattoo of a triangle with a needle and some pen ink (how is it doing btw) I've made some hard changes such as dropping choir (which I loved so much) and added principle of human services. I didn't want to do it, but we got into cosmetology and we need those credits out of the way! How is that going btw? Do you still want to be a cosmetologist or did you change your mind for the millionth time? Come on girl make up your mind!! Now we are going to more of the personal questions like did you get your first kiss yet? I know embarrassing but I have to ask it's not like I'm kissing anyone during quarantine... Or what about boys are they any boys you like that aren't like 5 years older than you? Are you dating anyone? Do you still have those dreams about meeting the one? Do you still feel like you're not enough? Is your anxiety getting better or is it getting worst? Do you love yourself? Have you lost the weight or get a big booty lmao? (this letter is all over the place omg). Do you still talk to Alicia or did you drop another best friend? I hope you didn't because I really like her and she is like my sister who understands me and doesn't try to raise me. What about Makayla is everything good with her? I never want to drop her she's been with my selfish ass since forever. If you did slap yourself in the face because you are an idiot! Anyways if you are having a breakdown breathe! It's ok to talk to someone about your problems. Everything is going to be alright. I have faith in us and hopefully 2021 is a better year because well you know how 2020 was. Do we live in a RV park now? I don't want to I want to live in my house. Is Michael less like a dick and let's you do what you want? What about mom? Is she toxic still? Does she call you names or is she getting better? Do you still have a weirdly obsession over Ariana Grande? One more thing don't and I MEAN don't tear yourself down anymore or do stupid shit to get our parents to notice. Like calm tf down one day we'll hear the words, "I'm so proud of you." It may not be today, tomorrow, or next month, but one day we will. How is your writing going btw? Or did Michael ban you from writing like he banned you from everything else. I swear one of those days we are going to snap at him. Anyways I have to go girly mom is coming into the kitchen and I have a feeling that she going to complain about something like she always does. -Love yourself <3 PS: JUST BREATHE AND CONGRATS IF YOU HAD YOUR FIRST KISS ALREADY! OK I'M DONE EMBARRASSING YOU THIS GOING PUBLIC BTW SORRY NOT SORRY

Epilogue

over 1 year later

Dear 14 year old me,

WOW…OMG WOW

so i never responded to this until now. um it’s the last day of 2022 and now we’re 17 YEARS OLD! I know...

'rewe we aaahahhh evry dol. Cuabees os coshol si azcyr hits hhig in was tusj oww ltilte utb gonuy i a nhrmfaes. Elt isdntea theso uyor oniustqse btu stlil orpeslmb reew shwi nrasew um em i ym.
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In hctae poaprlu jurion ouy ya!m iwtetrn vhea and ot ot eil,fbe we bale r’eew nda a ti she we ryuo dd’nit tkae !it eyar lmscoyegtoo year you yatnorrc etka oht ac!lytlua is zangmai etts it ehroomosp nwe of het gonhpi eewr si ubt to nogig usebeca vole uetrianaqn dna aetk rgtea.
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Ofr ypoulfleh eht ni !alfl utb gogin my eismt hcaeng go idmn few ot i ggoin rew’e a sitemocc n!ow to guirnns a to closho ddi eb w’ree altyluac suenr.
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Aawy yver sun to raey dcotrueeh cdieded btu na a did kealn a aedi toaott kni a mtei od empohsroo up btu it it cayalult oru nikad tlanregi a is dbmu rou ubt waay sith llo fdea angai edneel addef hte ti utlaac adn and idd wkee ottaot nep itwh uyo rfeta no lenak, you ew nki ,ti aatlulyc. Bc a re’uoy aws aelrt ryve ton nmoth omm twb enksya ti. Aeyr and swa ew tumeps rof to eth itecch say asetl a ot…uiorjon lsao had hlewi a.
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Sfirt ifrst tlo rlrsgsiinpuy 2202 ewer !61 of rfsit ew ogt a isk,s oethr ubt nit,soripahle i atc’n uoabt ltak fsrti tlo nwhe allyre fo d…ana uor ehpdpane we. Aym fo ftirss haaahahh ruo yob eavh yaer enbe otn ubt eht it swa ryae.
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A ybo tsfri ttah twih byoru…os ays tesl’ lnsrpohiatie jsut dan wta’sn. Uqinneatar het ceam and ton hatt rudne i dan raey a ricsis iurgdn irsatthg cnoucolsin ot nwko ew utb riginsupsr wnte homoopesr ee’rw. Leyalr tpar knwe didn’t em nwo i ltnui kwon a eamn of layswa i btu. Iseulab!x re’ew so.
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Dlo is asy my a ebrcn-nn1ogivs4n-i-inatg hicwh hoe self eary to to daink laos kaidn yzacr eewr’ eo-csranb gln. Orcnmati gib a were’ bu(t hhaaahhaha) spohesel tlisl.
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Btu ni raylel ti imte !onw enjoy esy we the ere’w naoxusi dtbeae nlyo unoxais illts tbu is’t laulycta we’re so okwn laytacul vrhneeew ear lsse i etx,nyai nda we afs ssruiiyglnrp hte about rayzc hte.
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Yuo dais owkn 6ht taht ebne a tesisr ti’s defrin in es’sh oknw ieset!b how sey swa inujor new ayll eb heav scien i mstolaue rf frdien tbu olyn )s,idutp tbu (hhwci best is adn our iedrfn culod ereht stlli a ew taht year bihct so sha i oyu tnhe mesa laaici pnaoi eth !ylla lkat uryo oen to is steb ew keil rade,g elft oryu dna adn pialntoc ally rof. Ally dan is’t you fro !lei!f aiaicl.
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Hse id’dnt we dlei otaub and cufdek ehr makalay er’we su ot thta hsit yr,maeon onw a omoeoprsh nad rfo rhe up some tnnoiem ebcuase todl adn i oru nto year is she tiwh drfiesn oesptdp rsaoen kgtnali. Af,ec ohw eseesvrd mi’ nto ppilgnas the a sseh’ lrai yeflsm in no erdfins. .
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Trage ): rohet asw niult odog eray tbu wsa taht ti regt!a 0212 a tahn ouy ijnruo dah leylra temi hnadpeep.
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Fliyfcoail fstfu ubt o’tdn vlie in a elr!rati otu yulck i hsti itnul ew nda su to ti moev we lods fro yrea, so alotms uhoes dcededi the eepk.
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It lol ew ndot’ uoy tirew pyro!et i know heta anremoy, a nesvlo wee’r ewtir ew spriunsgir ta eroytp tyluaacl luayaltc ubt olt rttbee.
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N’odt nwok uesyucbeo…a klat tuabo ayerll raldaye awnt i ot chemlai.
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A itlls tlsil nad erayll ’shes tbt,ere utb hse olt ’shse neam digon leyral aemn si abd lcytalua oll dah etciancd a tsuj omm.
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Araian sssbeooni oatyrl uro dernga but nwo wne ew is ftswi til,ls yultaalc veol. Oto we lnaa ery ucims ubt dle laos eys oelv.
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Yb wodn rutfeu i onw that em fo hte nthkngii :tshi psot up shit gnayis swlo otuba rdenswea ouyr elt prdpaew qsuesinot lal nda iygdn. Ucdfose ujts eedn on elif and yuo rolsufey onw ti rthgi is sa to. Ernve (we tnyigr nowd be ysnake tpos to adn lcam sutj rlane). And yare ayuptrbl wsa aws ayre oru ddene nresoi reay ebst it rsotw, o,nkw a,rey njiuro teh rshenfma si i ihst omhorepos. Btu i ,41 adn uect aspt uoy i aldoerba you how adn llayer in ayrvyeed velae i ot tboau teh nweh saw mssi i etmi do adn ts’i yuo ktihn was. Asw tola i ednahgc eb su btu htsi us tbw lsoa ’dnto how knthi nirtnaqeau dlhepe i qauarintne i dwluo ovcrside ma thowiut adn i ersonp si’t. Be plbobayr scseotl or in lhle htngsoeim the ’di ltisl.
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Yse utb etmi yuo trcehpa i wen ’tsi ofr smis a utb.
Gfoirev uyo i.
Kpee me nbgei 41 dlo tceu eyar.
Ni the eslyfuor -veol eturfu.

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