A letter from January 14th, 2020

Time Travelled — almost 2 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So today is the big day, the big 30! I guess when I was younger I had a set image of what 30 was supposed to look like. I would look to Jams and think, one day that’ll be me. Married in a home, with 2.5 kids! Of course the lord had other plans. Life never plays out the way WE want. It’s down to God to determine these things. These past few months have been a crazy whirl to begin with. Today I’ve received 3 important emails. 1 from Nia listing the last pay they’re giving me (which happens to be peanuts). It left me infuriated, in total I gave them 4 years of my life. 2 volunteering and 2 being employed. And during those 2 years I experienced and survived so much. But the end lesson is that I survived, Alhumdulilah I made it through. Soon after I received another 2 emails. 1 from WGN (my new work place), listing the docs I needed to bring in for my DBS. And 1 from Zohra at the MYH for me to come in and meet the team. Alhumdulilah I’m truly grateful for when one door closes... and I never expected all this. Lol I’m still single AF at 28. I’m sure he has a plan for that too. These past few days I have felt a little lonely but sabr is important. I know he will have someone special for me waiting. I hope the 30yr old Seeni isn’t still single. I pray someone is stood there with you, by your side. I hope and pray your heart and soul have been healed. And that you’re warm, full of gratitude and have a renewed energy for the decades yet to come. On the 10th Jan 2019 Sanna reminded me that it was exactly a year since our trip to Kenya and our incredible safari trip! Thinking of Kenya gives me goosebumps. Alhumdulilah there are always incredible times to be had. Just work and pray towards them. These past few months have taught me there is good in life. There is always ease following the struggle. A newly turned 28 year old Seeni is sending all her love and Duas. I hope life has been good. And if it’s been tough, I pray you’ve had the strength and support around you. Just like you did this past year. But always remember to be kind to yourself, you have become an incredible woman. Love x

Epilogue

18 days later

lol life is a funny thing isn't it?
So it turns out I grew leaps and bounds professionally. Found a work place I absolutely loved, with the...

Ostm ncrdibeeli ussol. Dicgeesnor rokw a plcea rehew wsa wrok pxrieecene ym and hrad. Detmpoor so i mchu asw so. The ew all ofc dan ith a uto npdcmiae ntrub ubt hten rewe eltitl. Aeevl ewn ot idfn dciifftlu a dieddce dienicos het to rujoyen nad keta i. ,koay tbu hte thwa is elif va'nhet tasht atht eatioditnns uotab i hredeca tslil. Ehotr the eon tgaink teh tearf amlsl t,epss bayb.
I i adh efart in fell etm i amn hsti a iynro adn is 0202 nwettri elrett olev onso ni het leyedp. Ays rifst ulocd oyu my. Adn asw etinesn amrw nad ti epde. Eagchnd asierel dinm nmofri he duhlso em shi d'ndit he dan. So hte e,ary oru wtne raineng 1 year hoelw ew aysvnaenrri. Isdk idardsngk edtieald dna a anpsl r,aiagemr fro dema. Ti aws uaplnfi. Tcu nflapiu nda dblriiycne deep. I nda hpel dednee but tghosu i ti het maed huotgrh. It rnnmgoi hte llih opt tdoos ta arnyjua fo my omsprire it i no dah nda i of t0h3 lla euibaluft thta ibrgth nkogwin eivdrvus to 4ht1 02,22 daem i. Ntaik,g we eilf of, ifgst om,ptelec adn ekpe nthiong het llmsa si rnlcdiebei neuorsjy eecveri oictnsss mtos we awth ubt sthta ssrirepsu dan. .
Eht btu ibg stol etm lvoe inedrf i most yam wen i vaeh a 'naletp'ito encibirlde. Sellev anorhte oru eeifrntdf loss vi,lse hbto ni neo deende we tohb ipnecrxenige fo. X ftig eht btes s'ti eben.

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