A letter from November 5th, 2018

Dear FutureMe, Today was awful and I spent the entire day wanting to kill myself. I hate that I can't just do it already. What's holding me back? If you have survived to receive this letter, you should get some help. It has been too long. Go get some therapy or something. Junior year is killing me and I don't even think I'm going to get into college. Like how did anyone do this? Why are AP classes so difficult? I try so hard but no amount of effort I put in results in a good grade. I literally study all the time. Right now we're reading Scarlet Letter and I don't understand it. I'm also doing the school play which isn't even a play, it's like a few acts mushed together. It's my first time having a speaking part and I have so many lines. School is so stressful. Like did I mention that yet??? Good luck future me!