A letter from May 14, 2023

Dear me in the future, Is being a sophomore better than being a freshman? How's pre-calculus treating you? Is it harder than algebra 2 or is it way easier? I'm hoping it's easier or at least in the same level so I don't have to struggle. I'm sure you're still in advanced theater and you're dreading taking Spanish classes because I want to get out of Texas and move to a more "American" city somewhere far away where I can send my dad an angry letter and the bisexual pride flag just for fun. I'll write it in English so that he doesn't understand and is forced to use Google Translate. When he finally finds out what the letter means, perhaps he'll be angry, so I'll block him, but at the same time, he's my dad. He makes mistakes, and maybe he doesn't deserve me cutting him out of my life. The thing is, he'll condemn me for the rest of my life, which is why I really want you to write that play for next year's Triple-A-Cabaret about Benny coming out to his father since I think it'll change his opinion. Dad thinks that it's okay to be ***, but at the same time, says that you can't practice being ***, which doesn't really make any sense. I'm an atheist, and I refuse to change my beliefs because religion feels like a suffocating cult trying to control your life. Plus, religion is often used for bad purposes, and I want to stay out of that and be myself. I wish I could be the super cool social media manager for the Academy Theatre page, but I don't think I'll be able to as long as Ash is still here. Ash tries really hard just to actually do something. I am not like Ash, and I will never be like Ash. Ash is super focused on theater while I'm just there to have fun and make new friends. Trust me, I'm going to post silly cat memes on there and advertise shows and meetings to people using cool software like GIMP and Paint.NET rather than Canva, which is a bit limiting and doesn't provide me much freedom when it comes to graphic design. Sure, it's cool and simple, but when it comes to graphic design, I like giving myself a challenge. I want to ride a motorcycle, but will I ever be able to do that? Did I ever get a car and my driver's license? Do I get more freedom than I currently have? I really wish I could go outside and have fun like other kids whose parents aren't completely insane. You know, I really want to go to a Green Day concert. All my friends have already gone to a concert, and I feel like I'm missing out. I really want to see my favorite band perform live and perhaps get their autographs as well. The problem right now is my dad, who is currently making up every excuse in the book so I don't get to go to a concert. I think he's being stupid, just like how I think his opinions on the LGBT are stupid. I think that as long as Jessie and me are still friends, I'm sure everything will be okay as long as you have another bi person surrounding you with stupid interests. I'm sorry for enrolling you in AP Physics, I thought it would look good in a college application and the counselor kind of pressured me to choose it. So Green Day is currently my favorite band, you know that. But, are you still into them? Did they ever release 1972 and is it a good album? Is it better than Father of All *************? Did you finish the Green Day CD collection that you started over a year ago by wasting 30 dollars on CDs and cassette tapes at CD Warehouse in Arlington? Listen, a new CD of Dookie was only 10 dollars, which is cheaper for what they would've sold for at Forever Young Records. There was also American Idiot and Nimrod which are some of the best albums in existence. Deciding on a favorite Green Day album is difficult. I think of Dookie, American Idiot, and Nimrod as candidates. All the other albums are great! Even Father of All is okay and sometimes, the songs will get stuck in my head while I am on the bus to school or to my crappy apartment with roaches that scare me. By the way, did you ever get Cinemark back? I absolutely want to use that account again. Are you working right now or anything? I mean, it's interesting how life works. My uncle once told me that I should get a job, but right now, I'm lazy and I just feel so pressured to perform really well in school, although I feel like my parents failed me sometimes. I would like to show you some of the songs that I enjoy from Green Day like Castaway, Blood *** and Booze, Basket Case, Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Redundant, Scattered, All The Time, Holiday, Jesus of Suburbia, Know Your Enemy, 21st Century Breakdown...I think you get the point.