A letter from January 16th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Right now, your life has completely fallen apart. You spend a lot of your time crying, in your room, not eating, not doing anything other than watching netflix, prime, whatever to keep your mind off of everything that's going on. I hope things are different for you, I hope you moved and found somewhere on your own. I hope your life is everything you expect it to be plus more. You came a long way but I hope you go further. Today is Jan 15th and you just realized that your relationship isn't going where you want it to go and you're trying to figure out how to fix it. You cried a little today but you're not as sad as you were a week ago and I'd like to call that progress. This life hasn't been easy but I hope you found peace. I hope you're still alive to read this letter. I hope you got better friends and I hope you cherish the one you have right now (one, singular, uno). You deserve all the good this world has to offer, don't ever doubt that. You weren't dealt a terrible hand but you weren't dealt and easy one either. Stop being so hard on yourself, you went from living on an island, thinking you'll never make a name for yourself and you moved half way across the world and started over. That has to count for something, you don't give yourself nearly as much credit as you deserve. I hope this letter finds you in a time that you need it, I hope this letter brings you some peace knowing that past you is hoping that future you will still be around. I hope you find the joy that you've been desperately searching for your whole life. You have goals, you have a purpose and I hope your depression doesn't hold you back from achieving them. I know this is cheesy, i'll send this to you in ten months... I think things should be different for you then. I want to say us so badly but you evolve so much every year, you'll be a completely different person by the time this reaches you. Anyway, I love you, i love you , i love you. Don't let your sadness get the best of you. See you, whatever version of you this reaches, in ten months. happy 24th birthday mama :) Stay safe banana <3

Epilogue

about 1 year later

Hey you,

two years later, i'm 25 now, your relationship is completely over but you've come to terms with the fact that it wasn't meant to be and that's okay....

Ldernea ouy and let ot olev go. Tewn at retbte last onw tead on tidang uo(y tnetggi 'eoruy ah) neve htgin a. For nda nolea evah ot your vinlig yarcs dan onw, nbee tst'ha oyu voe(y'u oyu whooo)o woeremseh no gaain wno undfo tub oson odvem two voem reasy. .
.
Onyl 'ouyer uyo ouy sa rkndu uyo nwhe od smis 'ondt ycr as ot, nyrela ti mostseiem btu hmcu esud. Scrya ton liefegn tooimnse uoy sa hyalvei sued sa ot st'i. Ouy s'seh gthhuo a reew lal oyu tath dan hpgelin a pukanc fnoud uoy the tspraithe tihngs nhpdeape new hwne yistht dik to. Nakid er,het psieeosrnd tdpeccea uyo dna refoerv that nhtig a oury 'tsi si tlsli. It hcum ylnrea sa n'stoed ti oldh to kcab udse yuo sa. .
.
Iesnrfd gidon rpuod now nda wtih yuo uyo heav for you reneeoctdnc fo adn tath im' rmya tebter. Jbo ogt igtlunggrs yuo reev orf mtee to nwe eht yero'u psya dsen ekma rsfti not brt,ete eimt atht a dan. A feli oyu yuor eince, hre eht amen ianma si hvea ovel of h'ses nda. Wfe ehav ouy pahpy cloo utb yelral meak neso oyu oostatt lraeyl a yeth dna mdbu. .
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Tub ot hty,sit ton mi' si lefi onagn igrnnael teerbt r'youe dlhnae tnhsig eli. 'tshwa ubt dracse cmeo to ey'uro so fo. . . Eupsr xietdce sola eyour'. .
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Hcgane fo atht mi' puord wlli vcaideeh 'dotn ,uyo illts eerv hnygteveir htat and i htnik adn ey'ouv. .
.
That of era raye ahd reay rfo uoy, arye eth lod rcifasseci is lod 23 tealynelr 25 rupdo ot meak ou,y fltaunhk lod 42 we si y,ou nda you ot 42 hreew egt ot eyar doaty lod. Ovel oyu i aab,ann truyl. <3.

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